Raivynn's Roost

Hiatus

2007-09-28T15:18:00.000-04:00

As you may or may not have noticed, posting has been sporadic the last week or so. Blogging has turned into a chore more than something fun to do. I'm burned out.

Therefore, I am taking an extended break from blogging. During this time I will see if the desire to continue returns, changes to something else, or stays gone.

Thanks to all who visit me regularly, I will update the Roost in a week with what I've decided.

God bless, and play nice!

Halo - The Future of Gaming

2007-09-25T11:55:00.000-04:00

You'd think this is a possibility with all the Halo3 tie-ins.

Have you ever played Halo? Will you?

I haven't. I'm not much for first-person-shooters. Especially player-vs-player ones. I just suck. Still, Halo3 looks to be graphically beautiful, and there is something a bit cathartic about blowing away digital enemies. I'm just not going to drop $350 on an Xbox 360 then another $50 or more just for a single game.

People are doing it, though.

Golden Shower Tree

2007-09-23T19:04:00.000-04:00

This was taken at Busch Gardens Tampa. The descriptive plaque would lead you to beleive the tree's name is taken from the golden flowers which bloom in Spring.

They lie.

The tree is filled with incontinent howler monkeys and is a trap for unwary park visitors.

Took me twelve trips on the water rides to get the smell out. =/

"God" Responds to Lawsuit

2007-09-21T12:49:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I told you about State Sen. Ernie Chambers of Omaha filing a lawsuit against God.

Today, God responded.

John Friend, clerk of the Douglas County District Court in Omaha stated a filing from God "... miraculously appeared on the counter. It just all of a sudden was here - poof!"

"God" claims that Chambers' point that anybody can sue anybody simply doesn't apply in His case. Earthly laws cannot be applied to Him, and the court lacks jurisdiction. "God" goes on to state that blaming Him for human oppression ans suffering misses the point.

"I created man and woman with free will and next to the promise of immortal life, free will is My greatest gift to you," according to the response filing.

I wonder if the Almighty will pull in the Devil as a material witness? Or, would he be too much a hostile witness?

Nebraska State Senator Sues God

2007-09-20T08:28:00.000-04:00

Sen. Ernie Chambers of Omaha is suing God.

The outspoken Nebraska state senator is attempting to make a point about frivolous lawsuits. And this one is about as frivolous as they get.

Chambers' suit claims God has made terroristic threats against constituents, inspired fear, and "widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants." The state senator also claims God has caused "fearsome floods ... horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes."

Even though Chambers has criticized Christians in the past, his lawsuit is not really an attack on the Almighty. Rather, it is in response to a recent federal suit against a judge who barred the use of the words "rape" and "victim" from a sexual assault trial.

I'm wondering if God will have to swear an oath on the Bible?

And, does anyone else think the fan in the background of the picture of Sen. Chambers sorta look like a halo effect?

Go to Seattle, Ride the SLUT

2007-09-19T13:09:00.000-04:00

This is one of the funniest WTF stories I've seen in a while.

The South Lake Union Trolley in Seattle has the unfortunate nickname. It was quickly amended to South Lake Union Streetcar once the unfortunate acronym was realized, but the damage has been done. You can read more about it here.

What makes it even more hilarious, to me, is the trolleys are being installed by area developers Vulcan, Inc. (Who claim the SLUT acronym was never true, a new urban myth).

So, technically, Seattle will soon have numerous Vulcan SLUTs running about!

Not Tonight, Dear, I Have a Headache

2007-09-18T12:29:00.000-04:00

No blog today. Near migraine level headache. Too much pain to even look for fart jokes.

See you tomorrow.

Squirrel Ninja Warrior

2007-09-17T08:51:00.000-04:00

I love Ninja Warrior on G4. (Called Sasuke in its original Japanese format.) This little squirrel has got them all beat!

If you've never seen Ninja Warrior (Sasuke), here is the Japanese original airing of only the second man to ever beat the course. (The course changes somewhat each competition.)

I foresee a fully Americanized version on the horizon. Though I do love the Japanese version. They have the best television!

Sure beats American Gladiators!

Which is making a comeback. =/

Toot-Tone: The Greatest Invention Ever?

2007-09-15T13:13:00.000-04:00

The audio is a little soft, you may have to turn up the volume slightly.

I'll never hear a ring-tone the same way again!

Thinking on it, I wonder if there are ring tones that make fart noises? What a great prank that would be to download it into your friends phone, set it to default, then call him when he's in a public place!

5min - Life Videopedia

2007-09-14T08:13:00.000-04:00

I just heard about this new website called 5min. It is a video sharing site that is for sharing knowledge and how-to's rather than cute animals, groin shots, or Internet freakology.

Here is how 5min describe themselves:

5min is a place to find short video solutions for practical questions and a place for people to share their knowledge.

The idea behind 5min is very simple: any solution can be visually explained in no more than 5 minutes. Our goal is to create the first communal Life Videopedia allowing users from all over the globe to contribute their knowledge by sharing visual guides in areas such as arts, business, fashion, sports, health, tech, food, and much more.

5min's basic philosophy is that everybody is an expert in something and has something to teach others, so why not share that knowledge for the better of the whole? That's why we created a place to gather that collective knowledge onto one platform.

You can read more at 5min's About page, and even *Gasp* watch a 5min video about them!

Unlike YouTube, Google Video, or other video sharing sites, you cannot embed 5min videos to a webpage, though you can send them to your mobile phone. The reason is 5min's proprietary Smart Player that is much more robust than typical online video players. With Smart Player viewers can slo-mo the action, zoom in and out, and more.

I like this idea. Having useful information in one place, rather than buried inside a pile of pseudo-entertainment, is a great thing!

Categories include: Arts, Fashion, Food, Games, Health, Music, Spiritual, Sports, Life Tips and many more. Thousands of videos are already available.

Some of the more interesting videos:

How to Survive a Knife Attack - Especially if it's a rubber knife, you can do it all in slow motion, and the knife-wielder is a passive behemoth!

How to Tie a Du-Rag - 'Cuz you never know when you might need to fly those gang colors.

How to quit playing WoW! - So you can spend more time looking at Hillary Duff Pr0n and researching how to create explosive devices!

How to Wash a Cat - This is followed by the How-to video "How to Treat Infected Cat Scratches".

Tips for Managing Your Zune - for all 3 non-iTunes users out there. You know who you are!

Who says online videos can't be educational?

The Guild - Episodes 1 - 3

2007-09-13T08:59:00.000-04:00

This is for all my gaming buddies:

The Guild - Episode 1: Wake-Up Call

The Guild - Episode 2: Zaboo'd

The Guild - Episode 3: The Macro Problem

Yes, that is Felicia Day, Vi from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. A couple others look vaguely familiar, but none of their names (from the credits) ring a bell.

Anyhow, funny stuff!

And eerily familiar overtones. o.O

Live Optical Illusions

2007-09-12T13:17:00.000-04:00

The brass nuts illusion is freaky! It works on the same inverted principle as the dragon video below.

Iron Man Trailer

2007-09-10T22:02:00.000-04:00

Iron Man is one of my favorite super-heroes. I used to love the whole playboy millionaire / super-hero / flawed individual thing he had going. And his armor suits were freaking cool!

On 05-02-08 Iron Man will burst onto the big screen. Robert Downey Jr. is an inspired casting choice to play Tony Stark aka Iron Man. John Favreau directs ol' Shellhead's debut picture. Many other big name stars are also on board: Gwyneth Paltrow, Terrence Howard, Hilary Swank, Jeff Bridges, and the incomparable Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury!

I'd advise going to Apple's website to view the trailer in a crisp, clean Quicktime or HD format.

If you don't wanna go there, the trailer has already shown up on YouTube. Not sure how long it'll be available, but here is a link to one below:

I love how Black Sabbath's Iron Man made it into the trailer. Makes me wanna see it even more!

It may surprise you to know there is already a fantastic, full length Iron Man movie available on DVD. The third in Marvel's animated features, The Invincible Iron Man is a surprisingly good adventure and origin story.

Iron Man's arch-enemy Mandarin is in this one, though continuity is much different than in the comics. His origin, battles with powerful magic imbued statues, a love interest, and more armor action than you fire a repulsor at will keep you glued to your television. Easily one of my favorite super-hero movies ever.

I'll likely watch this once or twice before next May. My anticipation level for the Iron Man movie is running high! I can't wait!!

Smallville Season 7 Teaser

2007-09-09T22:42:00.000-04:00

For all you Smallville fans out there!

Internet People (Frederator)

2007-09-08T23:06:00.000-04:00

"An animated tribute to the internet people of the world, wherever you may be. Animated by Dan Meth, with music by Dan Meth and Micah Frank." A Meth Minute 39 show.

How to Untangle Earphones

2007-09-07T13:13:00.000-04:00

Below is an easy, step-by-step video on how to untangle earphones from MP3 players and other devices.

I wanted to post this last night, but was too tired. This morning I find out it's one of those new viral videos, even getting featured on G4's Attack of the Show. Even the YouTube video jumped up almost 40,000 hits since I saw it and wanted to post.

*sigh*

Always the bridesmaid, never the bride! ~.^

Hooked on Phone-ics

2007-09-06T13:16:00.000-04:00

When people ask you for your telephone number, how do you answer? (assuming you are American ... other countries have different exchanges and sequences).

Most people will give the number in the standard sequence of three then four. As in one two three ... pause ... four five six seven. Or, with apologies to Tommy Tutone, 867 - 5309.

Other socially acceptable ways are to combine the last four digits to make two pairs of numbers. Thus, eight six seven ... pause ... fifty-three oh-nine.

Of course, when adding the Area Code most people say it in a three, three, four. Or, 555 - 867 - 5309.

Then you get the oddballs. The freaks of nature who do not have telephonic rhythm. Those technological throw-backs who recite their numbers in ways to make your ears twitch and your brain bleed.

Case in point, a man at the doctor's office where one of the kids went for a check-up and shots ( a whole 'nother story, that) was giving his number to the receptionist. This was how he gave it:

Fifty-five, fifty-eight, six-seventy-five, thirty, nine.

That's not his real number, obviously. I am again using the "Jenny" number, but his did end with a zero and a nine. (I should use his real number and hope my readers call him and set him straight on proper phone-number-giving etiquette!)

Even were you to write the numbers as he states them, you'd end up a number short.

55 58 675 39 (555-867-539_)

He knew what he meant. He knew that thirty and nine were two separate numbers. But they sounded as one ... thirty-nine.

The receptionist asked him multiple times to repeat his number with the same result. She stayed calm, the freak of telephony was getting agitated. After the third time repeating his screwball litany of numbers, he acidly asked the girl if she knew how to write numbers down. To her credit, she answered she was having difficulty typing them in and asked him to write the phone number on a scrap paper so as to make sure she did not make a mistake.

I stayed out of it, though I itched to storm up to him and blast him on how to give a phone number like a normal human being. I gritted my teeth and was restrained by my mother's hand on my knee. Oh, if I'd been that receptionist ...

So, after that debacle, she asked for his work number, if any.

Mistake ...

Three fives, eighty-six, seventy-five, three-oh-nine

Not even the same asinine cadence as before!!! (This one didn't end in zero nine).

I understand this may be the only way this guy can remember his phone numbers; by grouping the numbers in those sequences. It just goes against all things natural. Like gnarled fingernails scraping down the telephonic chalkboard.

The receptionist was onto the guy though, and seemed to get the number in one go. She was still nice and pleasant, still sitting with a smile on her face. I was contemplating if I rammed my cellphone in his ear if he'd get the whole numerical telephone sequence thing or not.

He wasn't any better when it came to his home address ... One hundred one thousand three hundred fifty two Ear Lick Arr Dee.

Wha?

First off, again with the odd numerical sequencing. Most people would have said one-oh-one, three-fifty-two ... or one-hundred-one, three-fifty-two ... even one-oh, one-three, five-two. Not this guy. He has to give it in long form notation.

And the road he was speaking of is Ehrlich (sounds like Uhr-lick) Road. I suppose calling it Ear Lick may be some cutesy family name for it, but I've lived near that road for most of my life and never heard it called that by anyone. And it was not an accent thing. He spoke Ear Lick as if it were two separate words.

Don't get me started on the whole Arr Dee thing. =/

By this time I was not agitated (and really wasn't as bad as I make myself out to be ... poetic license ~.^). But I was shaking my head in disbelief that anyone could be so ... abnormal on simple things like phone numbers and addresses.

Maybe it was karma was the whole pizza thing the other day. >_>

Anyhow, as a treat for listening to my rant about telephonic etiquette, here is 867-5309/Jenny by Tommy Tutone done in clay!

And as an extra special treat, you can read about the guy who tried finding Jenny at any 867-5309 number in the US.

Heroes, Ninjas, and Critters

2007-09-05T19:08:00.000-04:00

I spent the morning watching the first 7 episodes of Heroes on DVD. I loved the show when it came out, and watched the first 4 as they aired. As the weeks went on, I found myself involved with my Rebel Dragon guildmates in Guild Wars, then World of Warcraft. Heroes fell to the wayside, and I vowed to get the DVD when it came out.

I remembered I had not posted to the Roost when I received several oddball news links from my best Internet buddy, Johnny Crash. (I'd link to his blog, but he hasn't updated in months. *sigh*) And since I was watching Ninja Warrior with the family when Crash sent the links, it was not until now I actually got around to posting.

Thanks to him, I am able to give you a link about a Vicious Dog Pack Attack on a Florida Gator, originally posted on the always interesting, often funny Crazy for Critters blog. Beware! The chilling image of this horrific animal battle may be too much for the squeamish.

Small Medium at Large

2007-09-04T12:18:00.000-04:00

No, this post isn't about a short stature psychic on the lam.

It's about my call to Pizza Hut this holiday weekend to order lunch. The girl answering the local delivery hub's phone was pleasant and cheery. She seemed happy to take my order and things went smoothly until she asked me what size pizza I wanted.

"Small," I confidently answered.

"We only have Medium, Large, and Extra-Large," pizza girl informed me.

Now, seems to me if you have 3 sizes of pizza, the smallest of those would be Small, not Medium. I rolled my eyes and and clarified my statement.

"I'd like the smallest size you have."

"That would be Medium," she shot back, still with a smile in her voice.

"Okay, a small Medium."

"Ma'am, Medium is our smallest." I thought I detected a smidgen of exasperation creeping into her tone.

"Fine. Medium then," I carefully told her. I swear she sighed in relief. "Your small Medium pizza."

I counted to three before she replied. It sounded like through gritted teeth, yet still with a now forced cheeriness. "The Medium pizza is not small. It's pretty big."

"Oh!" I exclaimed excitedly. "So the small Medium is large?"

"Um ..." I knew I had her on the ropes then.

"Yeah, that sounds great. I want the small Medium large pizza." You could feel the tension through the phone receiver. Her mental cogs were churning, her eyes were rolling, her lips were pressed thin, and her finger were tightening around the pen, threatening to snap it. Or, so I envisioned.

"Ma'am, was that a Medium or Large size pizza you wanted? We don't have Small."

"Yes."

"Um ..."

"The small Medium large pizza."

"Maybe I should get my manager?"

"No need," I smiled into the phone, "We can work this dilemma out, I'm sure. I want a Medium pizza, which is your smallest size, yet is still pretty large."

"You want Medium size?"

"That's what I've been saying."

"Okay," she paused. "I'm sorry ... for the ... confusion."

"Don't worry about it. A small Medium large is exactly what I want. I'm glad we're on the same page now."

"Um ... yeah. Thanks. Is there anything else today?" Cheer was guardedly slipping back into her voice.

"Yeah, A pan pizza, mushrooms, onions, sausage, bell peppers."

"What size did you want that?" I'm sure the question slipped out in rote fashion.

"Medium Large, please."

I got at least 5 seconds of silence on that one.

I do so love boring Monday holidays! ~.^

So how was your Labor Day?

Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires (And This Squirrel)

2007-09-02T14:20:00.000-04:00

Coin Puzzle - Are You a Genius?

2007-08-30T10:16:00.000-04:00

Okay, I know I said I'd take a few days off, but I'm feeling better and can sit for a little bit, so ... Here is a post I was holding onto. Just watch the video below, and follow along with it. Just to help you out a bit, you will be asked to get five coins: three large and two small. (Quarters and pennies work well.)

I'm ashamed to say it took me 5 tries. I am typically much better at these logic puzzles, especially after seeing the solution. D'oh! In my defense, I had a sinus headache and was under the influence of Sudafed and my usual cocktail of prescription medication.

If you go to the website shown in the video, there is a slew of comments to the video saying how they completed this coin puzzle in four moves or less. By the rules in the video, yes, they did. But I'd add another rule to the puzzle which states, "When moving the paired coins, their ending position must have one of the two coins touching at least one of the non-moved coins."

How well did you do?

Few Days Off

2007-08-29T12:32:00.000-04:00

I likely will not be blogging for the next few days. A painful medical condition has arisen that precludes me from sitting too long. I'm too embarASSed to tell you what it is. Butt, hopefully I'll have some PREPARATION done for when I return, TUCKing away little ideas and such.

Until then amuse yourselves with Star Wars: Attack of The Hemorrhoids!

Kitty Say What?

2007-08-28T10:23:00.000-04:00

Now I got this song stuck in my head! Nooooooo!

D&D&Me

2007-08-27T08:39:00.000-04:00

Wow ... that D&D video was perhaps the most boring and poorly put together piece of promotional crap I've ever watched. I put the wrong video up. I had meant to post this one:

A much more light-hearted look at Dungeons and Dragons over the years.

I've played D&D since Summer 1979. Yes, my first time playing was when I was 8-years-old!

All I really recall is I was given an elf to play. At that time elves were not a race, as much as a class. They were a combination of warrior, archer, and magic-user. I didn't care about that then, though. I knew my elf could shoot a bow and cast Magic Missile! Of course, my mental image of Magic Missile was of miniature ICBMs flying out of my elf's hands, not mystical shards of light doing force impact damage. I was eight! Whaddaya expect?

The only other thing I recall from that very first experience was encountering a stegosaurus. Now, I loved dinosaurs at the time. One of my favorite toys was a pack of cheap, multi-colored plastic dinosaurs I would play with for hours, doing mock battles, attacking my other toys, growling and roaring.

The fact said Stegosaurus was in a 10'x10'x10' room in the middle of an underground dungeon never crossed my eight year old mind. Nor did the fact that Stegoaurs do not eat meat, yet piles of bones and half eaten goblin corpses littered the hallway surrounding the door into the dino filled closet. What did register is that the damn thing killed my elf in one lousy hit. This was after my Magic Missile spell bounced harmlessly off its scaled hide, as well as a slew of hastily shot arrows.

I didn't really get into playing D&D until a few months later in 1980, after the Christmas break, when a friend of mine got the Basic game from Santa. Our small group of friends spent hours and hours pouring over the rules, creating new characters, and trying to draw what our carefully crafted characters looked like. All before we ever stepped foot into a single adventure.

The Keep on the Borderlands was my first, real adventure. Fighting orcs, goblins, and the occasional Ogre and undead in the Caves of Chaos is still a warm memory. My elf made it all the way to level 3 this time ... before a black dragon ate her. She had no chance, really. The dragon was hiding under a pile of dirty goblin clothing in a small side cave. The DM (Dungeon Master) added that little encounter into the published adventure after deciding we had done enough Dungeons, it was now time for the Dragons part of the game's title. =/

I was beginning to hate reptiles.

The rest is history.

Playing D&D gave me a way to unleash my imagination, a love of reading (mostly fantasy stories at that time), exercised my math skills with its often arcane rules of figuring out if an action succeeded, broadened my communication skills through story-telling and role-play, and taught me how to research by looking up rules in the books, as well as all sorts of esoteric things relating to medieval times from the library. (Yeah, I learned the difference between a bill-guisarme and a halberd, as well as what a buttery was, and why a longbow was deadlier than a crossbow, among other things. You know, important knowledge to help me in my day-to-day life!)

I've played, and collected, D&D since. I used to have several of the varying Basic Sets (but they were lost or otherwise misplaced over the last 27 years). I have many original 1st edition rulebooks, most of the 2nd edition core rule books, the vastly underrated Skills and Powers options set of rulebooks (more like a 2.5 edition), and the core rulebooks for 3rd Edition.

I never "upgraded" to 3.5 Edition, though i do have the 3.5 Basic Game box set which I keep intending to teach and play with the boys, but never do. Mainly because, by the time the weekend rolls around, we are so busy with one thing or another, someone is on restriction for something, or Mom isn't feeling well (the only real gaming spot is a table very near her bedroom), we have no time. Plus I play WoW ... a lot. More than I should.

Which brings us to this weekend and the lack of posts Saturday and Sunday. I could have, but they would have been made in the late afternoon, almost evening. Evenings are times when I like to pop into WoW and hook up with online friends to hang out. Plus, one of the kids was in big trouble (for something I felt was minor and way overblown, but Grandma wouldn't let it go! *sigh*) and the house was an unpleasant place to be, let alone try to write a blog.

All in all, I'd rather have been in a 10'x10' room with a Stegosaurus.

D&D 4th Edition

2007-08-24T14:39:00.001-04:00

An official video about the recently unveiled, upcoming 4th Edition of the venerable Dungeons and Dragons role-playing game.

More to come later ...

Another Fine Chinese Product

2007-08-23T12:31:00.000-04:00

This is a Chinese made bubble blower called Bubble Breezer (or Bub L Breezer). Yes, he blow bubbles out of his butt. No, I'm not providing a link to where you can get one. You'll know how to find one if you really wanted one ... not that anyone would. Right?

Besides, with all the Chinese recalls lately, you'd be lucky if this thing didn't blow up in your face, or create leaded bubbles.

This product might explain doggy breath:

It can't be be any worse than the possible upcoming US introduction of the well-made Chinese automobile manufacturer Chery Amulet. See how well it fares in a standard crash test.

That's pure quality there, folks! You just don't get full body accordion crumple like that in American cars these days. (Technically, that was a Russian crash test demonstration of the Chery Amulet).

Chrysler has inked a deal with Chery to begin selling its cars here in the US. Mainly compact and sub-compact cars in the $10,000 to $15,000 range. And, yes, they will still make money on such cheap automobiles manufactured in China and shipped to the US. [cite]

Chrysler is going to have to do a Hell of a job selling this piece of crap to the American public. Oh, sure, they will likely get it up to American safety standards. But, the stigma of being Chinese made, especially after the recent spate of dangerous Chinese made recalls, will make most people think more than twice about buying one. The viral video above will be burned into a lot of peoples' consciousness. The Buy American segment will surely use any and all manner and media to discredit the purchase of these cars.

We're a ways off from seeing them in the US, and Chrysler is probably more interested in growing their brand name in foreign markets, where these cars, even in current state, would sell nicely. Still, the US market could use a reasonably priced, safe, fuel efficient small car (think VW Bug a few decades back.)

Time will tell. Maybe these Chery built cars will be a good thing.

And, maybe it'll blow bubbles out of its tail pipe!

Adventures in Foosball

2007-08-22T08:21:00.000-04:00

Two Christmas's ago, we bought the kids a Star Wars Foosball Table. It was a Wal-Mart special, only %59.99. A deal, I thought. Until I had to put the monster together.

Fortunately the kids were visiting their Grandparents in Michigan. I'm not sure their tender ears would have withstood the blistering tirade of curses, oaths, and mumbled dire imprecations for the designers of this do-it-yourself game from Hell.

Not that the instructions were difficult; indeed, they were quite clear, concise, and relatively easy to follow. Not that the parts were packed poorly; everything was labeled, each hardware component was packaged separate and marked, nothing was damaged, chipped, worn, or scratched.

Sportscraft, the maker of the foosball table, did an excellent job with this product. Other assembly-required manufacturers would do well to emulate Sportscraft when packaging their products.

No, the trials and tribulations of assembling the game table came from two sources: the sheer volume of parts and the idiocy with which I went about putting it together.

Clearly this was going to be a two person job. Of course, I went it solo.

I had my trusty Black & Decker cordless power drill. I had my case of Craftsman hand tools. I had plenty of floor space in which to work. I had ample lighting. I had a big-screen TV with all sorts of Christmas specials on to entertain me as I worked.

I was ready to work!

Except that I had forgotten to charge up my drill. And, several screwdrivers, the Allen wrenches, and my crescent wrench were mysteriously missing from my tool case. And, the volume of pieces from inside the tightly packed, deceptively small box grew to take over the living room, the couch, and portions of the walking area between the front and back of the house. The lighting was fine ... from one angle; the rest of the place may as well have been the dark side of the moon. The television was fine. Except that with all the product pieces carefully strewn about I couldn't comfortably see anything, let alone sit down to watch it while waiting for my drill to charge. It did give me time to locate my missing tools. Most of them. A few are still AWOL. You might see their pictures on the sides of cans of WD-40, right under the "Have You Seen Me?" caption.

Long story short, after several long sweaty hours, a few splinters, a scraped knuckle or two, and much moaning, groaning, and general cursing, standing before me in all it's glistening glory was a bona fide, working foosball table. A 48'' x 24'' x 32.75" monument to perseverance, ingenuity, and sheer stubbornness.

I couldn't have been prouder.

Until my mother came out to see it and asked me if all the handles were supposed to be on the same side of the table.

...

Longer story shorter, after another sweaty hour, more splinters, a scraped knee to match the knuckles, more moaning, groaning, and enough cursing the FCC threatened to shut me down, I had wrestled the table apart, swapped the bars to their correct positions, and reattached everything. In the meanwhile I cracked an important stabilizing piece and almost cemented myself to both the floor and the table with some strong wood glue.

Did you know wood glue is great for removing fingerprints? Off your fingers?

The game table looked sharp. Darth Vader glowered from one side. Yoda brandished a lightsaber on the other. Clone Troopers and Federation battle droids faced each other in stony silence (well, hard plastic silence), waiting for the momentous occasion when the first plastic ball rolled onto the slate battlefield. The goal nets waited like ravenous maws. I swear I could see them salivating.

Well, the kids came back home, oohed and aahhed over the foosball table ... then proceeded to play their new Gameboy games.

Over the last two years, the table has been used several times, but serves mostly as a convenient travel path for the cats to get from the couch to the top of the television.

Yesterday was one of those days where the plastic clone troopers and Federation driods did footie battle.

The kids and I played a cut-throat tournament of winner-plays-loser. Star Wars foosmen spun like demented dervishes, dancing wildly across the table. The ball spacked and popped back and forth, a white blur on the blue-green field of deadly battle. You could almost hear the roar of a crowd as fancy moves and well-timed kicks sent the ball soaring into the awaiting maws of the goals.

Okay, what really happened was I had my ass handed to me by a 13 and 10-year-old.

I jammed my pinky trying to quickly grab one my sticks to block a shot. I pinched the skin of my thumb in the small hole the pole slides through. My back seized up trying to awkwardly stoop down so as to reach the gaming rods. And once, the ball flew out of the table box with enough force to knock my glasses askew.

After a celebratory dance by the kids, whom ended up tied when i called a halt to the tournament (no fool, I), the table was slid back into its customary spot.

The cats were pleased their highway was returned and promptly sat on it, shooting looks of scorn at their crazy humans who needed plastic men mounted on rotating rods to bat a ball around. That's what paws were for. Sheesh.

The Ballad of the Noob

2007-08-21T13:00:00.000-04:00

This was hilarious! And, yes, according to the video's creators, they are aware alliance and Horde cannot actually talk to each other, let alone trade items.

You may want to turn this up a little, as a few spots get kinda hard to hear.

Back to School

2007-08-20T09:13:00.001-04:00

A few years ago there was a commercial for Staples that showed a man gleefully dancing about as he pushed a shopping cart full of school supplies to the Christmas tune of "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year". His two kids glumly trudged along behind him, faces set in sour expressions.

I love that commercial!

My kids weren't near as despondent as the kids in the commercial, but they weren't exactly pleased saying goodbye to the freedoms of Summer and camp at the Y. One is going into the 8th Grade, so he's happy to be Top Dog in his Middle School now. The other is going into 5th Grade, to a brand new built school. So, he is Top Dog in his Elementary with all new everything.

They wear school uniforms, so clothing was easy. Solid color Polo tops and jeans are the order of the day. Still, they both seemed very happy (and a little surprised) at the new cargo jeans they got. (Grandma is straight-laced and jeans with cargo pockets, Velcro, faded, or otherwise deviate from normal, utilitarian jeans were a non-no.) New socks, new shoes, new belts. Even being boys they like to be stylin' a bit the first day of school.

New backpacks, too, for all the new school supplies. My youngest got a one-strap over-the-shoulder pack, in camo and black. Compartments and zippers everywhere on that thing. My older boy got a messenger bag, like you'd see those bike messengers carry slung over their shoulder as they slalom dangerously through New York traffic. It has several discrete compartment to keep his books, folders, and binder separate from one another, pen holder, a few big pockets for his calculator and pack of markers. I want one, but have no use for it. It's just cool.

What sucks big time this year is the revamped bus schedules. Last year, both boys went to the stop at the same time, with only a 15 minute gap between pick-up times. This year, the Elementary starts an hour earlier. so instead of leaving the house at 8:10 AM for a 8:25 AM pick-up, I have to get him down there by 7:10 AM. Ugh!

He did well in getting up earlier. He got up, dressed, ate breakfast, did his morning chores, and was ready to go in (for him) record time. His brother has to get up with him, unfortunately, because we simply aren't doing breakfast twice. He gets an hour to read, maybe play his Gameboy DS a bit, but no television. Me? I'd use the time to go over my homework from the night before or study for a test that day. But, then again, I was a nerd in school.

My older boy is being allowed to walk to and from the bus stop now. A huge step for him, and us. With his behavioral problems and trust issues, we're hoping it will not turn around and bite us. We want to extend him some trust and responsibility. I know he can do it, but I still get those small, niggling doubts crawling through my mind.

We live in a retirement community. A place of wrinkled old farts with too much time on their hands, and a need to control others since they cannot control their own bladders any longer. (There are a lot of wonderfully nice older folk in the park, don't get me wrong, but the few loud-mouthed control freaks override the nice like fecal coliform in the swimming pool.) There was trouble at first when the boys came to live with my Mom ... until the state told them shut-up or tell it to a judge. I'm sure there will be some complaints when people see him walking down the main road to the bus stop. They can bite my butt.

I did give him several tules to follow:

Stay on the main road.
Do NOT walk in, through, over, or across any body's yards.
Do NOT stop to pet any animals.
Do NOT stop to look at something interesting, especially if it is in some one's yard.
Do NOT pick up anything off the ground. (Sticks, pennies, shiny things ... he's like a freakin' crow sometimes.)
Do NOT talk to anyone unless they talk to you, and then keep it to "Hello", "Good Morning", or "Hi".
If one of the walking wrinkles tries to stop you, asks you what you are doing, or otherwise harasses you, keep walking and tell them to talk to me!
If your bus doesn't come on time, your butt better be sitting at the stop until 9:00 AM, at which time you may come home and I'll drive you if I'm in a good mood. Missing the bus means you miss school, stay in bed all day, lights out, until the time you'd normally get home. (Guarantee he won't "miss" the bus more than once! hehe)

We couldn't make it to either school's Open House for the meet-and-greet with the teachers. You'd think the schools would schedule the things so as to not interfere with each other. Plus, they were both on the last day of summer camp and the kids went to Busch Gardens. I wasn't going to make them miss that for a hot, stuffy, long, boring school event where you see the teacher for 5 seconds, cannot find parking within a half mile of the campus, and get confused by each teacher contradicting the other as to rules, supplies, and procedures. *sigh*

I'd better wrap this up. My first kid'll be home in four hours. I'm sure he'll have a list of supplies three times the amount of what the school said he'd need. And another list with demands for cash for various things like an Agenda, class supplies, yearbook, blah, blah, blah ...

JK Rowling is Writing a New Book

2007-08-19T09:28:00.000-04:00

J.K. Rowling, she of Harry Potter fame, is writing a new book.

Word on the streets, more accurately in the Edinburgh cafes she haunts, is the new book will be a crime drama, a criminal detective novel. [cite]

Now, that just seems a strange leap from the Harry Potter books to writing crime novels. Though, with all the dark doings, murders, and other deaths in the later books of the Potter series, perhaps it is not so much a stretch. And, there is much of detective work to be done, and mysteries to unravel, in the latter half of the Potter series. That they are swathed in magic seems to belay the fact that they are, at their heart, a mystery novel.

You can be sure curious readers the world over will snatch up whatever she puts out. But can she hold our attention sans Wizards and Muggles? Will the new book be kid-friendly, or geared more for adults? I guess we'll have to wait and see.

Harry Potter and the Bloody, Dismembered Corpse, anyone?

The Brothers Tauren 2

2007-08-18T00:02:00.000-04:00

Meh, not nearly as funny as Red Sky Foundry's first one, but humorous enough. This was posted to YouTube on November 8, 2006. Being that was almost a year ago, the chances of The Brothers Tauren 3 being made are not looking so good.

Red Sky Foundry also did a SIMS machinima (movies made from video game captures). It can be found at their woefully un-updated website. It's pretty funny, and the SIMS game seems well suited to making your own movies in it.

Wonder what a WoW SIMS game would be like? Hmmmmm ...

The Brothers Tauren

2007-08-17T12:58:00.000-04:00

Created by Red Sky Foundry. This is one of the funniest, and most professional, WoW movies I've seen. I'll post the sequel tomorrow.

Monkeys, Butts, and Coconuts

2007-08-16T10:39:00.000-04:00

Up Butt Coconut is now mnemonically implanted into your brain. You shall wander about all day singing these words to the querulous looks of co-workers, family members, friends, and passersby. You're welcome!

I wonder if the monkey in the belly tattoo below lost his coconut?

AC-DC

2007-08-15T10:12:00.000-04:00

No, not the rock band.

In this case AC-DC stands for Air Conditioner Does Cool.

That's right, my AC is working again! Yay!

Per the tech guy (who looked a little like Corbin Bernson) the unit was just frozen solid. No repairs were required. Freon was charged, pressure was good. He also mentioned the unit looked like the Trane equivalent of Frankenstein. (We've had numerous repairs to it over the years, especially after it got fried by lightning.)

We were charged a total of $130 for two trips out. I was a bit miffed at that, but can only blame myself because I did not see any ice in the unit and did not shut it off before his first trip out. This required a second trip after we sweltered all night with the AC off.

Still, small price to pay in light of what it could have been. Though the tech did state the unit was on its last legs, and we had better start saving for a new one. We're hoping it lasts until the lawsuit against the roofing company that screwed up and caused major water leaks is settled before this happens.

So, if you live in Tampa and need air conditioning repairs, I highly recommend Action Air. Friendly, not as prompt as I like, but they did not push us to get a new unit, and no mysterious ailment of the machine was diagnosed. It wasn't broken, they said so, and I appreciate that kind of honesty in a business.

We've found our new AC company, and when we do get a new unit, they'll be who we go through.

For anyone who thought they'd find some real AC~DC stuff here, and for those of you who read through the entire post above, and because as hot as it got last night reminded me of Hell ...

Cubicle - The Movie

2007-08-15T00:01:00.000-04:00

Hah! It was a fart post!

Cuz, it's hot, the AC isn't going to be fixed until later today, and I ain't cranking the 'puter up 'til it is! (Or until evening when it cools down some.)

No AC, I See

2007-08-14T19:40:00.000-04:00

Sorry no post earlier today, and for the rather brief one this will be.

Our Air Conditioning went out yesterday. It still runs, technically, but it was not really putting much cool air into the house. After calling a local AC repair place last night, being told they'd be here around 1pm, then not seeing them until 5pm, the prognosis is still unknown. The unit was frozen solid, according to the tech.

He will come back tomorrow (for another visit fee, of course) and diagnose the problem after the ice has thawed. I'm hoping it's something minor like a bad hose or low freon. We cannot afford costly repairs, let alone replacement. If it came down to it, we'd have no choice. Though most likely we'd purchase a few window units instead of paying 5 grand for a new unit.

The house is fairly cool now. I pulled out a few of those big box floor fans we had, cranked up the ceiling fans, and positioned everything for a nice air flow. It's warm, but not excessive. We made sure all the lights are off (amazing the amount of heat they put out, even the fluorescent ones we use in many of the lights).

The computer generates a substantial amount of heat, too. Hence my minimal use earlier today. Even now, with it being on just 10 minutes, the temp has risen noticeably in my room. It's still tolerable, for now. I'm going to play WoW a bit, see how the temp goes. I may be on a WoWless night. I'm sure the twitching and drooling will subside once I fall asleep.

Hopefully, when the tech returns sometime tomorrow, news will be good, air will; be cool, and charges will be low.

Just wish I could open a window, but most are locked down and difficult to open. Plus, we get no air flow anyhow and at least the humidity is kept at bay. I'm hoping for rain tonight. hehe

Flash Gordon (Sci-Fi Series)

2007-08-12T18:38:00.000-04:00

Sci-Fi, wasteland of cheesy "original" programming, has unleashed a new, "hipper" version of the space opera hero, Flash Gordon.

I loved the Flash Gordon movie from 1980 with Sam Jones as Flash and the incomparable Max Von Sydow as Ming the Merciless. It was as campy as you can get, with cheesy special effects and a rocking soundtrack by Queen. I saw this in the theater when it came out. I watched this every single time it came on HBO or Showtime in the '80's. I watched the television cartoon series. I even had Flash Gordon and Ming the Merciless action figures (even if Ming's gun looked more like a hair dryer).

I had high hopes for the new Flash Gordon series when Sci-Fi's teaser commercials used the old Queen song, Flash's Theme. Then I began seeing more substantial commercials showing the actors and a little of the action. I was not impressed. Several reviews of the show I had read gave me even more pause about the new Flash.

With great trepidation I got comfortable on my couch and tuned into Sci-Fi channel's premiere of the pilot for the new Flash Gordon series. My two boys were ensconced in their favorite tv-watching spots (couch for one, floor with pillow for the other). Mom was kicked back in her recliner.

The opening sequence was a huge disappointment. Generic music alongside images of a buff, blond guy running in a marathon, actor names superimposed over the whole thing. How utterly boring. Here is this (hopefully) high energy sci-fi series of an iconic space hero, and your big opening sequence is him basically jogging?!?! My hopes were dwindling fast.

The new series diverts from the traditional and familiar, while still staying fairly true to the legacy of Flash Gordon. What irks me the most about this newest incarnation is the sheer youthfulness of most of the principle actors. I know it's a ploy to garner the younger demographic, but when Flash's Mom looks like she could be dating him instead of mothering him, I get the creepy-crawlies.

One stylistic change is no space ships travelling between Earth and Mongo. Instead we get rifts between the two worlds, operated by a handheld remote control/tracking device. (Sliders, anyone?) While this makes a certain sense in being able to allow inhabitants of either planet to instantly move back and forth between worlds without all that pesky interstellar travel time, it just doesn't seem like Flash Gordon with out cool spaceships. And, why not have some sort of spaceship with warp technology, or something? I imagine it was a budget constraint behind that choice, but I have a feeling it will bite them in the butt.

Flash's big motivation in this go-round is finding out the truth about his Father's supposed death. Turns out Flash's Dad and Dr. Hans Zarkov had been working on a rift generation program called "Portage". Instead of dying, as everyone thinks, Papa Gordon ended going through a rift to Mongo, where Ming (sans the Merciless) finds out about this powerful technology and sends robots to Earth to search for the Imex, which holds the key to the "Knowldge of the Universe".

When all is said and Done, Zarkov, Flash, and Dale Arden (now a television reporter and Flash's high school ex-sweetheart) team up to discover where Papa Gordon is. Flash and Dale accidentally end up on Mongo where we meet Ming (played more modern-tyrant than maniacal despot, and also very, very white ... you'd think they would have kept the oriental influences ... too non-pc, perhaps?) and Princess Aura. Things begin to go downhill for our heroes; torture, enforced sexual slavery, and being involved in tepid dialogue and weak action sequences, not too mention the worst fake blood I've seen in modern television.

Flash and Dale escape Mongo with the aid of a disguised Princess Aura. Hijinks ensue back on Earth, with Baylin, one of Ming's best bounty hunters, arriving to bring both Aura and the Imex back to Mongo.

The pilot episode wasn't bad, but it wasn't a Stargate or Battlestar Galactica.

I warmed up to both Eric Johnson as Flash and Gina Holden as Dale. My favorite so far is Jody Racicot as Dr. Zarkov. John Ralston plays Ming very flat and uninspired, at least so far. He's about as generic a villain as you can get. Aura is also a tad over-acted; another generic spoiled princess with something to prove to Daddy Dearest. The bounty hunter Baylin seem like she will be an interesting addition. Everyone loves the bad-girl gone good characters. And, as a really new addition, Flash's best friend on Earth is black guy named Nick. I guess this was their nod to a balanced racial cast in this blandish, politically correct casting. (Which I find odd a Hispanic character is lampooned so badly for cheap humor in this episode.)

The special effects weren't anything special. We've seen it all before, often done better. But they weren't bad.

The show held my attention, barely, and it got better as it progressed. The subtle inter-play between Flash and Dale is not overdone, but you know where it's going. Humor abounds without getting too over-the-top, excessive, or campy. Dialogue is sometimes contrived; again, we've seen it all before and better delivered.

Still, I am going to give this a few more looks. there is a wealth of as yet untapped Flash Gordon lore to delve into; the various kingdoms of Arboria, Frigia, Tropica, and the Hawkmen's flying city, as well as Prince Barin, Prince Thun, and Prince Vultan. I know Barin will be in it, based on the info on IMDb.

I'm not impressed yet, but I'm not disgusted either. I'll be trying to catch the new episodes each weekend. Time will tell.

Flash Gordon airs on Sci-Fi Fridays at 9/8C. you can visit the official Sci-Fi Flash Gordon website for more info and 30-minute peek at the first half of the pilot episode.

As a special treat for you, here is a video of Queen singing the iconic Flash Gordon theme song!

TMNT (2007) (DVD)

2007-08-11T19:21:00.000-04:00

Twenty-three years after debuting in a Mirage Studios comic, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are back in their fourth full-length feature film. Unlike the previous three film outings, this one is fully CGI.

Ostensibly taking place after Shredder's defeat in the second film (and very likely the third film as well, due to the appearance of the Time Scepter on the trophy wall), the Turtles must overcome their petty squabbles and familial rifts to battle a new menace in the form of an 3,000-year-old immortal warrior hunting alien monsters and stone statues of his former Generals.

A less-clueless, more pro-active April O'Neil is now living with vigilante Casey Jones, who is chafing at settling down. The Foot Clan makes an impressive appearance, led by Karai, who has taken over from the deceased Shredder. Though hints are given that Shredder may not be as dead as the Turtles think, leaving things open for a follow-up film. Leonardo is off training in South America, Michaelangelo is working as a birthday party entertainer, Donatello is an IT Support guy, and Raphael fills his days with sleep and the nights with vigilante justice as the Night Watcher!

I loved the heck out this flick in the theaters, and loved just as much on the recently released DVD.

The animation is crisp, fluid, and rife with depth of texture, shadow, and light. This is, by far, my favorite CGI movie to date, visually speaking. Very little is static; from natural, life-like eye movements, to the gentle motion of breathing, to the ninja-quick fight scenes, this film just breathes life into the millions of moving pixels. The visual style is less realistic, more anime/manga, yet you find yourself immersed in the story and able to relate to the emotions of the very expressive characters.

The music chosen for the film is fantastic. The well used theme music gets your juices flowing. A version of Black Betty by Big City Rock and Lights Out by P.O.D. pump it up during a couple of the frenzied fight scenes. There are other surprisingly good tunes utilized to great effect through-out the movie. (Soundtrack can be found all over, including at Amazon, who I hope won't sue me for linking to their audio clips. ^.^;;)

The voice acting was top notch, though a few of the tertiary characters were obviosuly voiced by the same few actors. Laurence Fishburne narrates, Sarah Michelle Geller is April O'Neil, Chris Evans voices Casey Jones, Patrick Stewart voices the Immortal Warrior, the late Mako does a phenominal job as Splinter, and you will hear several familair voices from other cartoons and video games through-out. The dialogue is never stilted, often amusing, and fits each character well.

TMNT has a strong story to tell. It is engaging, with a perfect blend of action, humor, and drama. Compared to many other films out this year, TMNT delivers on plot without all the excessive fluff and marketing bloat.

If you want a great action film, one you can safely watch with your kids, or even all by your lonesome, you can't go wrong with four ninja turtles and gi wearing rat!

The DVD has a lot of extras, mostly commentary and few partially completed scenes, including an alternate opening and ending. Some storyboard comparisons, and interviews with Patrick Stewart, Sarah Michelle Geller, Laurence Fishburne and the filmmakers round out the special features. The disc I got has both wide-screen and full-screen versions, always a plus. (I like wide-screen movies, the kids and Mom like full-screen on their smaller TVs). You really can't go wrong with this DVD ... well, okay, I dislike the DVD cover (which I couldn't find a decent pic of on the 'Net). The cover was just too cartoony and belies the fantastic CGI animation awaiting your eyes on the disc inside. (The DVD gets 4 Raivynns).

I give TMNT a solid 5 of 5 Raivynns! You've never seen the Turtles like this!

Raivynn Rating

The Legend of Zelda: The Hero of Time

2007-08-11T13:18:00.000-04:00

I know, double update. Don't fall over in shock.

The Legend of Zelda: The Hero of Time is a slick looking trailer, isn't it? While not big-budget, summer blockbuster, special effects laden eye candy, it looks polished, clean, and interesting.

And it is a real movie being made.

Don't believe me? Go visit the Legend of Zelda Series website.

It is an in dependant film not associated with, nor endorsed by, Nintendo. It is also apparently wallowing in delay. Even so, the trailer is something tot be proud of, and it looks no worse than the typical Sci-Fi Original Movie plopped onto your television every week or two.

I'd watch it. Not sure about paying to see this version, but on TV or free download? sure, I'm there!

Pac Man: The Movie

2007-08-11T12:56:00.000-04:00

The premise of this parody is actually quite good. Spirits, or perhaps ghostly aliens, invade after a technology labs' experiments go horribly wrong. It is up to them to stop it ... using the newly developed Particle Acceleration Capsules!

Okay, it's not really exactly what the fake movie trailer is all about, but I sorta like my premise a little better than the one they sorta show. Still, this is hilarious. The best bit is at the very, very end!

Minesweeper - The Movie

2007-08-10T22:59:00.000-04:00

I cannot wait for this movie to come out. It looks like it could be the best video-game-to-movie conversion EVER!!!

Click HERE for a slightly better quality version at colleghumor.com.

What do you think are the best and worst video-game-to-movie translations?

The Dangerous Book for Boys

2007-08-10T13:52:00.000-04:00

This is for all my readers out there who have boys of their own, are still are boys at heart!

I've flipped through this at my local Best Buy (of all places). I plan on getting each of my nephews a copy of this for Christmas. It's four months away, but at least it's one present out of the way! There is a lot of cool stuff inside, as you see from the video above.

Just think how you Dad's out there could have fun and connect with your sons using the things in this book! I'll see if I can connect a bit better with my nephews. Moms can do things with their sons, too!

The Dangerous Book for Boys

My Top 5 Favorite Super-Heroes

2007-08-08T12:03:00.000-04:00

In response to a couple super-hero related posts made in the last week or so, Jason (Steel) from the Man of Steel blog asked me who my favorite super-heroes are. So, here are my Top 5 Favorite Super-heroes ... and Why!

#1 - Spider-Man

I loved reading Spider-Man comics growing up. The adventures were exciting, the villains were nefarious, and the message of "With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility" spoke to me even at that young age. (I read Spidey comics from the late '70s up until even now ...)

From Spidey's comics I learned that even though some choices are tough, and the easy way is often the wrong way, you still need to do what is right. And you need to do that even when no one is watching, or knows who is doing it. I learned to stand up for myself, and to stand up for those who cannot, even if it means discomfort, being scared, or even risking what others may think of me. It directly influenced me to help teach a Sunday School class for retarded citizens when I was 14 to 16. I wanted to help others who needed it, who couldn't help themselves, despite the teasing and taunts from my so-called peers in church.

I couldn't crawl walls, or sling webs, or punch out bad guys, but I could make the special citizens laugh with my puppets, help them color an Easter picture, patiently listen and try to understand their limited speech and desires, or calmly shrug off a violent outburst now and again.

Of course, my parents, my teachers, and my church all helped teach me these things. But kids don't like to listen to those in authority, or heed their advice ... but a comic book, something on my level ... now that I could emulate. I'd like to think in my recent life, when my sister was murdered and my mother became needful of in-house care, that those lessons were what allowed to unhesitatingly leave my high-paying job and move in to care for my mom and my nephews. Spidey would have ... except he maybe would have socked a villain in the jaw as he did.

Of course, some people would say that what I probably learned most from Spider-Man was how to be a smart-ass with the funny lines! ~.^

#2 - Hulk

Counter-point to Spider-Man was the Hulk. The beast-within mythos appealed to my young psyche. I have always felt a deep, burning rage inside me. A dark anger I dare not let loose. I didn't know its cause. I didn't know its reason. I only knew that were I to let slip the beast within me, I'd never be able to go back.

Bruce Banner exemplified these internal struggles, but he would unleash his inner monster. Destruction, confusion, and chaos reigned as the Hulk rampaged. Only the love of Betty Ross, the friendship of Rick Jones, and the compassion of others he has met along his conflicted journeys would reign in the raging monster. I vicariously romped about with the Hulk, my inner beast satiating itself on these excursions. Yet, I also learned that no matter what I became in life, no matter if I let my inner beast loose, there were people who would still love me, still care about me, still help me.

In my late teens I learned these feelings I was experiencing were from a severe chemical imbalance compounded by bi-polarism. And true to the tales in the pages of the Hulk comics, my family, my good friends, and God stuck by me, supported me, and loved me, even when I was at my worst.

#3 - Batman

Batman is just plain cool. He has no super powers. He's not invulnerable. He can't fly. He's not super strong. But he is smart, he is dedicated, he is passionate. It helps that he is also filthy, stinking rich.

I always liked that even without any super powers, Batman went out and fought crime. Tried to make a difference, to protect others. The gadgets were always cool, of course, but it was his sharp mind, his reasoning skills, his sheer intellect that truly drew me to his comics.

As with Spider-Man and Hulk, I learned something from Batman growing up. I learned to use my mind, to think. To look at things from different angles, from different perspectives. To utilize available resources to accomplish my goals. And I learned to never give up. When the chips were down, when all seems lost, there is always an option.

#4 - Kitty Pryde

Shadowcat, Ariel, Sprite ... Kitty Pryde has used a number of codenames through the years, but most people know her as plain Kitty Pryde. A member of the X-Men since 1980, she quickly became my most favorite member of the team. Her phasing ability was cool, she was smart, she was pretty, and she had a little purple dragon as a pet!

Kitty was never the most powerful of the X-Men, but she held her own. She was the heart and soul of the team. A kid-sister to many members, a friend to others, a lover to one or two. She grew from an awkward, shy, insecure waif into a confidant, intelligent, courageous leader. She was fun-loving, compassionate, and honest.

From Kitty I learned that it was okay to try new things, to grow and to change, that friendships are precious, and that you could still be a leader and have fun.

#5 - Plastic Man

Plas may seem an odd choice to be a favorite super-hero, but there he is. He's been around since 1941; a long time for any super-hero. He's undergone several revisions since DC got rights to him in 1956. Plastic Man is a fan favorite of many, has been in several incarnations of the Justice League, had his own Saturday morning cartoon, and the occasional self-titled comics.

He can stretch to seemingly indefinite lengths, into any shape, any size; even intricate constructs with moving parts. However he almost always stays his colors of red, yellow, black, and flesh colors. Plas is nigh indestructible, and possibly immortal. He may be one of the most powerful super-heroes ever.

Plastic Man used to be criminal until he was wounded and gained his powers in an acid bath. He is always cracking wise; sometimes with inappropriate comments. (Something i can relate too! ^.^;;)

I can't say I "learned" anything from Plas while growing up; I just liked him for his jokes, funny shapes, and interesting character. I suppose one could say, however, that even a bad person deserves a chance to become a good person. And, no matter how much you change, you'll always be who you are.

There you have it. My Top 5 Favorite Super-Heroes. Hulk and Spidey were hard to place, but Hulk was barely edged out as I though of this list. If I were to do a Top 10, the remaining 5 heroes would be (in no particular order): Iceman, Iron Man, Ghost Rider, Daredevil, and Sue Storm, the Invisible Woman. My favorite comic to read currently, and a super-hero making a bid to join the Top 10 ranks, would be She-Hulk!

Who are YOUR favorites, and why?

The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)

2007-08-07T10:06:00.000-04:00

Bourne is back, and he is better than ever!

A reporter unearths secrets about Jason Bourne and a black ops program codenamed Blackbriar, setting in motion events that propel the amnesiac assassin around the world. Bourne races against the enigmatic Treadstone Seventy-One to uncover the truth behind his existence.

From Moscow, to Paris, to London, to Madrid, to Tangier, and coming home to New York, Bourne battles other assassin "assets", evades local police forces, has a spectacular foot chase through the streets of Tangier, a tense game of cat-and-mouse in the crowded London Waterloo station, and several death-defying car chases and crashes.

The story is tight, and the plot never gets lost or muddled through the twists, turns, and location changes. The acting is well done, never flat, never too over the top. I loved Albert Finney as the mastermind behind Bourne's creation. Matt Damon continues his stellar portrayal of the titular assassin, even teaching us that a good book is useful for more than just reading!

The action sequences are frenetic, and filmed in that nausea inducing choppy camera style so prevalent today. I much prefer the clean action style of the prior released Live Free or Die Hard compared to the jerky, blurred, WTF-just-happened style used in Ultimatum. It is often hard to tell exactly what was going on, which in ways amplifies the violence as well as masking it.

I suppose this frantic, spinning camera-work simulates the uncertainty of a violent situation, as if it were real. The few times I've been in a fight, or a car wreck, my memories of it are certainly more jumbled than crisp and clear. It also helps keep the violence level down to achieve the PG-13 rating by making it appear more is happening, confusing viewers with sudden jerks and blurry action.

I don't recall any cursing in the movie, and if it was present, it was minor and fit well within the context of its use. A refreshing change from the expletive filled, PG-13 summer block-busters released thus far this year.

As you hear in the trailers for this film, Jason Bourne finally remembers everything about his past. He rushes to confront the people behind it, learning more than he cares to about what really happened. The ending will leave you cheering.

If you liked the first two Bourne films, you will love this one. Action, suspense, intrigue, and a captivating story will leave you breathless and wanting more.

I give The Bourne Ultimatum a reluctant 5 of 5 Raivynns! If the camera work on the action sequences were cleaner, clearer, this would have been an no-brainer five. I like to see my action, not be befuddled and nauseated by it.

Raivynn Rating

Bourne to be Wild

2007-08-06T10:16:00.000-04:00

Okay, we've all heard the various play on words regarding the Bourne series. I couldn't resist.

I plan to see The Bourne Ultimatum later this afternoon, with a review to follow soon after. I wanted to see The Bourne Identity and The Bourne Supremacy again before seeing Ultimatum, but that was not to be. *sigh*

I am reading Robert Ludlum's original novel, The Bourne Identity. It differs greatly from the 2002 movie of the same name based upon the novel. Considering the novel is set in 1980 (the current year when it was published), much of it is dated and technology is much more advanced 20-odd years later. The movie had to alter quite a bit to stay current and relevant. Cell phones alone change the tone of the story in so many ways.

Anyhow, just to get your juices pumping for the movie, here is the trailer for The Bourne Ultimatum ...

Oh, wait! That was the Kimmel Show's trailer. Sorry!

Here's the correct one ...

Wonder who would win in a fight between Jason Bourne and James Bond?

I think, Bond fan that I am, I still would have to give the edge to Bourne. He is just more ruthless, more cold than Bond. Plus, while Bond was spitting out a pithy one-liner, Bourne would shoot him in the kneecap. (Though the "new" Bond, played by Daniel Craig in Casino Royale is more Bourne-like than Bond-like, so he would at least make it a good fight, if not a draw).

Then again, Bond could use a gadget to defeat Bourne. Sneak up on him in a crocodile submarine, laser his belt in two with his wristwatch, then knock him out with a pseudo-judo karate chop to the neck as he bends over to pull his pants up.

Still ... Chuck Norris could kick both their asses with one leg tied behind his back, blindfolded, and set ablaze with kerosene and a flamethrower!

Or so the Interent would have us believe. ~.^

Jurassic Park - Weird Al

2007-08-04T23:14:00.000-04:00

I believe there is more "blood" in the claymation video than was actually seen in the actual movie. ^.^

This is one of my favorite songs from the Alapalooza album.

Don't forget to vote in the poll to the right. I'd hate to send rabid pants weasels after you if you didn't.

Ode to a Superhero - Weird Al

2007-08-04T00:55:00.001-04:00

One of Al's lesser known parodies, "Ode to a Superhero", based on Billy Joel's "Piano Man", has been very nicely cut to scenes from Spider-Man 1 and 2.

I've always loved how Al tells a movie's plot through a song parody. I'll be posting a few more this weekend.

Enjoy!

(Don't forget to vote in the Poll to the right, if you haven't already!)

I Can Still Read Your Mind

2007-08-03T12:22:00.000-04:00

Cable was out most of the day, so here is another mathematically inclined mind trick for you. Grab pencil and paper, or a calculator ... ready?

Pick a number between 1 and 9
Subtract 5
Multiply by 3
Square the number (multiply the number by itself)
Add the digits of that number together, for example, if your number is 83, you would add 8 and 3 and get 11.
If the resulting number is less than 5, add five, otherwise subtract 4
Multiply by 2
Subtract 6
Assign a letter to your number. A=1, B=2, C=3, D=4, E=5, etc
Pick a country that begins with your letter
Pick an animal that begins with the second letter from your country
Think of the traditional color of that animal ...

While the Order of the Elephant is the highest honor of Denmark, you won't find many real grey elephants there (outside of zoos, that is).

Now, you may have really thought outside the box and come with a brown emu, or maybe even elk. If you were really slippery, you might have come up with a black eel. But, I'm fairly sure you wound up with Denmark ... though Deutschland (Germany) is a possibility.

No, you thought of a grey elephant in Denmark. ~.^

I Can Read Your Mind

2007-08-02T00:14:00.000-04:00

Well, OK, I can't, but this video can!

Oooooooo ... scary!

Try it with any number, even a big one. Go ahead, we'll wait while you get a calculator.

Now go try this on your friends!

If you haven't, please vote in the poll! ==========>

Superman Doomsday

2007-07-31T23:47:00.000-04:00

Superman Doomsday Trailer

I cannot wait for this!

I have the original Superman Doomsday graphic novels (somewhere), and eagerly read the story when it first came out around 1993 starting with "Death of Superman", then "A World Without Superman", and then the return of the Man of Steel. This Direct to DVD movie follows all three major plot lines from the comics, covering three years of comic continuity.

There are changes from the source material, however.

Doomsday doesn't beat the snot out the Justice League before tangling with Big Blue. And, we will not see the four pretenders who take up Supes' mantle (Cyborg Superman, Steel, Superboy, and Last Son of Krypton). Those two are the biggest deviations. Apparently, in this version, Superman is the only hero on Earth.

The DVD will also be PG-13, so expect more visceral violence than in previous DC animations. It should be interesting to see what they show and do.

Villains in the DVD will be Lex Luthor, Doomsday, and Superman himself. (He fights his darker side). Toyman is also listed on imdb.

Casting includes Adam Baldwin as Superman, James Marsters as Lex Luther, Anne Heche as Lois Lane, and a few other voices you might recognize from numerous voice overs in animation.

I have high hopes for this movie. It has got to be better than the enjoyable, yet lackluster Superman Returns. We'll find out in a couple of months.

Superman Doomsday will be available on 8.17.07

You can see more at the Official Superman Doomsday Website!

You Won't Like Me When I'm Angry!

2007-07-31T11:17:00.000-04:00

I love comics. I love super-heroes.

Hulk is one of my most favorite super-heroes. Sometimes on the side of angels, sometimes not. Always looking out for himself.

Hulk has gone through so many incarnations, so many vastly different looks, it can be difficult to decide which one to do a particular movie on.

Most people know the iconic Lou Ferrigno Hulk from the television series, The Incredible Hulk. I loved the series while growing up, even if Hulk was too skinny, too short, and not green enough. Compared to my beloved Hulk comics, that is.

They got one thing right, however ... the facial features. Savage Hulk is my absolute favorite look for the Emerald Giant. Lou captured the bestial Beast-Within appearance I have always felt Hulk was best suited for.

The 2003 movie, Hulk, used pure CGI to create Hulk's face (and body), though it did seem extrapolated from actor Eric Bana's actual facial features.

I enjoyed the movie for what it was, but felt Hulk's portrayal was overdone in a few ways. The biggest of which was his growing to huge, tree-sized proportions. It makes sense in a way. He'd need a massive frame to carry and utilize the correspondingly massive musculature. He did keep to the Hulk maxim of growing stronger the angrier he got. His face was very humanized, less bestial which gave him a humanity for the audience to relate to, but detracted from the overall monster-inside-us counter-point director Ang Lee seemed to be trying to make.

The fight scenes, excepting the final battle, were fantastic. Pure super-hero beauty on screen, pure Hulk. I was even excited to see they kept Hulk's leaping miles at time in. The middle of the movie was the best, while he fights the Army and escapes from the underground bunker. I even enjoyed the comic-style transitions between scenes Ang Lee utilized.

Unfortunately, Hulk didn't do as well as hoped, and was panned by many critics, both film and comic buffs alike.

The upshot is a new, Hulk movie is going forward. Not a sequel, but a re-start. A re- imagining of the Verdant Behemoth with new cast, and radically different look for the eponymous title character, The Incredible Hulk. I'm stoked after seeing this clip from Comic-Con!

Edward Norton will be playing Bruce Banner, with Liv Tyler as Betty Ross and William Hurt as Gen. "Thunderbolt" Ross. Tim Roth will be playing Emil Blonsky, which means we may actually see some hero vs. villain action in this movie with Hulk going up against the Abomination!

The Incredible Hulk is currently slated for a July 13th, 2008 release.

Poll Position

2007-07-30T13:17:00.000-04:00

I've added another Poll to the right side of the screen, bottom of the first section. You may choose multiple answers.

I did this Poll for several reasons. First, I finally found out why I could not adjust my blogger layout (and how to work around it by removing the 2 from the www2 URL prefix). B, I woke up with a bad head cold and went back to sleep after taking the kids to camp, reawakening at about noon-thirty in time for a bologna sandwich lunch. And, 3, I never know what to put up, really.

You gotta admit, it beats having another Fart post!

If you inadvertently came here looking for information about the 1982 Namco arcade game, you're not entirely out of luck. You can watch the original Pole Position commercial (love that theme song!) or download a version to play right on your computer!

And just because I wubs joo all ...

The Simpsons Movie (2007)

2007-07-27T15:57:00.000-04:00

Best.
Movie.
Ever.

Not!

Near the beginning of The Simpsons Movie Homer berates a crowd of people for watching an Itchy & Scratchy movie they paid for when they could watch the same thing at home, on TV! More prophetic words by Homer were never spoken.

Oh, there were a few moments that you wouldn't see splash across your television during a typical Simpsons episode. But, as with more recent seasons, it appears the willingness to stretch boundaries was dropped in order to keep it PG. Well, PG-13 is the rating given to The Simpsons Movie, but it is far, far less PG-13 than any other similarly rated movie released this year. You'll see the reason for the rating if you watch this film. It's not language ...

This is not to say I did not like the movie. I did. I laughed many times, snickered a lot, and even sang along with about 2/3 of the hundred or so other movie-goers when Homer sings the Spider-Pig song ...

"Spider-Pig, Spider-Pig, does whatever a spider-pig does."

You don't get that sort of unplanned, spontaneous audience participation in many movies.

The movie plays out like a long episode of The Simpsons. Unfortunately, the closer to the film's release it got, more and more of this lean 87 minute movie was shown in trailers, clips, and talk shows. While it does drive up interest in seeing the movie, it detracts from the final experience because you've seen the gags dozens of times. Some held up to the hype, like the spider-pig song, while others drew flat amused laughter, as if they once found it funny but now ... meh. (The wrecking ball scene is a perfect example).

The story is not a bad one, a bit more epic in scope than most episodes, but nothing ground breaking.

Lake Springfield has become dangerously polluted. Lisa Simpson exhorts the town into doing something about it. Dumping into the lake is banned. Good ol' Homer, however, dumps in a silo full of porcine poop instead of going to the hazardous materials plant. Now the lake is toxic, threatening the rest of the country, forcing President Swarzzennegger to place a containment dome over Springfield. Homer is found out and blamed. Now, Homer and family must save Springfield and themselves. Hilarity ensues.

In the course of this straight forward plot, we get to meet a high profile band, an extremely high profile actor, the entire population of Springfield, and, of course, Spider-Pig.

If you are a die-hard Simpsons fan, you should rush out and see this. If you merely like the Simpsons, do as Homer suggests and save your money for the DVD or rental. If you hate the Simpsons ... well, there must be something wrong with you. See your family physician immediately!

If you do go to see this at a theater, wait through the credits for some more fun and a surprise or two. ~.^

I give The Simpsons Movie 3 of 5 Raivynns!

Raivynn Rating

Will the Simpsons Movie Stink?

2007-07-27T11:41:00.001-04:00

Based on this trailer, it just might!

Ok, Ok ... I had a post I wanted to do. I really did. Then I got sidetracked. Then, I got lazy. Plus I need a shower if I'm actually going to go see the movie today because ... well, Eau d'Naturale doesn't go over well in a crowded theater.

I'll let you all know how it was!

Something

2007-07-26T09:55:00.000-04:00

I am supposed to post something everyday, so here you go ...

Something!

My kidney is hurting. no real post today. I should go to the doc, but after the $700 radiator, kids' camp fees, and my previous meds and visits, compounded by the fact I am uninsured ... I ain't got nothing to pay the doc with. *sigh*

My legs are doing much better, however. Healing up nice, awaiting the next outbreak in quiet fear and consternation. I *cough cough* saved some of the meds so if it happens again, maybe I can catch it quick without having to lay out a few hundred bucks again.

Dunno what is really wrong, kidney wise. No pain while going or anything like that. One doctor told me it was my back muscles not my kidney. But, I think he was just not willing to spend much time and effort on an uninsured patient. I know the difference between back muscle pain and kidney pain. I've had kidney stones (well, it was more of gritty sludge which is worse, I've been told), and this feels similar. Far, far less painful, but the ache is close.

I have been drinking a lot of milk and caffeinated soda the last week or so. Both are extreme contributors to the build up of calcium in the kidney. Especially for those prone to it. Gonna lay off the soda and moo juice a while. Stick with plain ol' Tampa water ... which is about as clean as drinking out of the gutter after a summer rain. Always sediment or something sticking to the sides of my cup after I drink it. Might be my pipes. The place is going on 20 years old ... =/

I use bottled water, if i can. But I hate dipping into the hurricane supply we try to keep in stock. We have several flats of those 20 oz. bottles. Easy to carry, stackable, and can be placed in the truck quickly. Plus, no need to worry about cups and other stuff in an emergency, and they can be used for other purposes when empty (if needed, use your own imaginations! ~.^).

So, there you go .. something posted. Hope you're happy now!

Harry Potter - The Musical!

2007-07-25T12:53:00.000-04:00

Okay, so it's really just a guy singing a home-brew song about (the then upcoming) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows book. This guy and his brother are spendign a year with out written communication and are doing daily video blogs to each other. (You can learn more at www.brotherhood2.com)

re: Anonymous

2007-07-24T09:38:00.000-04:00

Last week, I had a post apologizing for missing a day or two of blogging. An anonymous commenter left the following reply:

"That's no excuse. It takes like what? 5 minutes to post something? You say updated daily. So update daily! You have an obligation to your readers. Our time is too precious to be wasted visiting sites that claim regular updates and don't deliver. Of course, your readership is probably not very many. I'm guessing no more than 10 a day, probably less. Get RSS at least, so people know when you've updated. And get rid of that old poll while you're at it! Hope your mother is okay. Peace!"

Aside from someone being anonymously combative, I don't see how any blogger is obligated to provide content of any sort. It's not like readers pay for the privilege of accessing whatever drivel I decide to spout. Sure, if a blogger makes a statement that updates will be on a certain schedule, then that blogger should try to uphold that statement. Real life intervenes quite often, however; sickness, appointments, unforeseen delays in travel, the simple blahs ...

Think of my update schedule as a guideline, a rule of thumb, a suggestion of intent. Not a binding contract of service providement.

No one forces readers to visit their blogs. Sure, I like to see those page hits, I love to see those comments (even good ol' anonymous'). This is more of a hobby, a way to possibly entertain a few friends, maybe make a few new ones. It's no job, though sometimes it feels like one when I'm feeling ill or have no content ready to post about.

I appreciate all my readers ... and, unlike Anonymous' bitter guess above, it is more than 10 a day. According to Google Analytics, I've had 8174 pageviews since I started the blog on January 1, 2007. That averages out to 40 visits per day. (Okay, it's 39.87317 per day ... maybe from those families with 2.5 kids?)

No, it's not a huge number. Substantially more than 10, however. And, that is the average. Some days I have more, some days less. Weekends seem to be a huge drop in readership, but even then it's around 15 or more.

Some other interesting stats:

The average visit time on the site is 00:06:01 (six minutes) and viewing 1.45 pages per visit. Just under 30% of those are returning visitors, which equates out to about 12 people who come everyday. Again, not a lot, but I'm not shooting for a huge audience.

If things keep going the way they are, I should have 10,000 hits sometime in September or early October.

Okay, I'm done ranting. Time to pick up the kids from the airport.

Now there is something I wish I really could put off! ~.^

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (2007) by J.K. Rowling

2007-07-23T11:22:00.000-04:00

This review contains no spoilers.

Harry Potter, The Boy Who Lived, is back for his 7th, and final, book in the wildly popular series by British author J.K. Rowling. He is once again accompanied in his adventures by Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, along with appearances by just about every character named in all the other Harry Potter books.

The story is woven with as much magic and excitement as any other Potter book, yet you can feel the tenseness throughout the narrative as Rowling leads us through to the final showdown between good and evil. We are breathlessly drug along from one narrow escape to another as Voldemort and his Death Eaters are on the hunt for Harry now that his slain mother's protective charm has broken on his 17th birthday. Harry, Hermione, and Ron embark on Dumbledore's final mission to locate and destroy Lord Voldemort's hidden Horcruxes, magical vessels containing portions of his very soul!

Rowling revisits many locales from previous books, as well as introducing new ones. Characters both loved and hated, old and new, are showcased. Many with unexpected surprises attached.

Deathly Hallows deftly slips all the disparate threads into a solid whole. Old questions and loose ends are wrapped up nicely, leaving the reader feeling satisfied, and quite possibly surprised.

The action is ramped up in this final book. Blood flows and bodies fall as the war against Lord Voldemort reaches a stunning peak. Never is it described for shock value, garishly or grotesquely, but some younger readers may be disquieted by the amount of violence and injury. I noticed more casual swearing in this outing than previous books, as well. Nothing excessive, and it is not jarring, though I could have done without a few of the "effing" comments. One notable line seems to be lifted directly from the movie Aliens. I actually laughed a bit at it. You'll know it when you see it.

Rowling has claimed that two important characters die in Deathly Hallows. This is true. Though more than two people die in the entire story. Some are expected, some are not. All have a bit of poignancy about them.

The book is a bittersweet ending to the Harry Potter saga. It leaves you fulfilled, yet sad at the series passing, much as you may be over several of the deaths in this book. Rowling has not ruled out the possibility of future adventures in the world of Wizards and Muggles, but I expect any such revisitation to be a few years coming.

Until then, we can look forward to two more movies, both of which should be mega-hits. Deathly Hallows almost seems as if it was written with the movie version in mind. You are sure to get that Big Screen feeling while reading this non-stop final adventure.

It is truly a magical experience!

I give Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows full marks; 5 of 5 Raivynns!

Raivynn Rating

Pottermania

2007-07-21T11:57:00.000-04:00

My Harry Potter book shall be delivered very soon. I will be reading it all day, and tomorrow, too. So my reviews of Ratatouille and Order of the Pheonix will be delayed I'll post more WoW videos however over the next two days ... just to keep you entertained.

WoW - Just As Long As Me

2007-07-21T11:43:00.000-04:00

Jonathan Coulton's song put to WoW video by spiffworld.com.

WoW - I'm Too Sexy ...

2007-07-20T11:26:00.000-04:00

Not the greatest video ever made, but I found it amusing.

A Long Two Days

2007-07-19T13:48:00.000-04:00

Sorry there was no blog entry yesterday, nor really one for today.

Yesterday was filled with doctors appointments, at the tail end of which the car began to overheat. Not fun to have happen in Florida near 100°F weather. We had to turn the air conditioning off in the car to limit the stress on the radiator. We also ended up having to stop several times to allow it to cool down. (Once was at an Arby's, so at least I had a good lunch!)

My poor mom does not tolerate heat very well. I was worried about her, quietly freaking out that the car would make it home, and trying to put forth a confidant, cheerful face. If my emotions got to me, Mom would fall apart quicker than a Jenga game played by termites.

By the time we got the car home, it was past 4 o'clock. I've posted far later than that, but I was beat. After cooling off, I relaxed on the couch, ate some supper a little later, then played some WoW.

I had hoped to complete a long, arduous class quest chain for my mage. But circumstances precluded that, which was just as well. I was worn out from the long, hot day and tiring fast. Plus, I needed to be up by 5:30 to get the car to Firestone by the 6 AM opening.

Sure, I could have set an appointment, but you know car places. They'd get to the car when they got to the car. And, the earlier it was in, the earlier they could diagnose it, and the quicker parts could be ordered. I knew parts would have to be ordered.

My thoughts were that either the water pump had gone, or there may have been a hose problem or a blockage. the radiator didn't seem to be drawing water from the reservoir.

Turns out the radiator was blown. It had to be replaced to the tune of around $700. It also took from 6 AM until 2 PM of me sitting in the slightly warm, very noisy shop office. I'm beat.

So, ummm ... no funny videos, no stupid jokes, not even a half-hearted fart moment.

Lucky you.

WoW - Big Blue Dress

2007-07-17T10:46:00.000-04:00

I thought this was hilarious! I also liked the music. ^.^

Amish Paradise - Weird Al and WoW

2007-07-16T11:39:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite Weird Al songs (a parody of Coolio's Gangster Paradise). The video is well done, and the thought of an Amish Night Elf is too funny. I like how the author even used original Warcraft screens for the barn-building sequence. hehe

WoW and Weird Al

2007-07-15T10:27:00.000-04:00

After a brief Transformers interlude yesterday, we're back with more WoW music videos! This next one is a paordy of Weird Al's original "That's Your Horoscope for Today". (Ironic, isn't it?)

Obviously the video was created before the Burning Crusade expansion pack. Still, hilarious! For those of you who would like to hear Weird Al's original song ... here you go!

Which Transformer Are You?

2007-07-14T10:57:00.000-04:00

I've seen this at a few blogs and link sites, most recently over at TekPhreak's. Thought I'd give it a go. My first try I just picked what I thought woukld be funniest for me to anser, and I got Megatron. =/ Then, I answered seriously and got:

Find out which Transformer you are at LiquidGeneration!

Give it a go and see who you'd most likley be.

Bit of a warning though, like the recent movie, this quiz is PG-13.

WoW - Gadetzan Hardware Store

2007-07-13T10:52:00.000-04:00

Great WoW video done to the song, "Hardware Store" by Weird Al Yankovich!

WoW - A Pirate I Was Meant to Be!

2007-07-12T09:40:00.000-04:00

World of Warcraft ... Pirates ... Funny Video ... ???

Enjoy

This Present Darkness (1986) by Frank E. Peretti

2007-07-11T10:05:00.000-04:00

The battle between Good and Evil takes on a spiritually terrifying mien in this novel by Frank E. Peretti.

The title comes from Ephesians 6:12 (RSV): "For we are not contending against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world rulers of this present darkness, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places."

Spiritual warfare is brought to vivid life in this gripping tale of the small, quiet college town of Ashton and the demonic forces striving to take it over.

When an investigative reporter photographs the chief of police in a secret meeting during the town carnival, she is thrown in jail. The new owner of the local newspaper with family problems, a young preacher accidentally voted in to serve as pastor, and the beautiful, spunky reporter soon become embroiled in a diabolical conspiracy involving Ashton's most powerful and influential people, an enigmatic New Age professor, a mysterious New York power broker, and a desperate woman on the run.

In the spiritual realm, Principalities of the Air pit their demonic hordes against the Hosts of Heaven. Demon against angel for the souls of Ashton. The forces of Heaven are outnumbered by billions. The Faithful in Ashton must join with God's Host to battle the evil spirits and end the threat to their town - and ultimately to the entire human race.

While This Present Darkness is a Christian authored novel, it tells an awe-inspiring tale of demons vs. angels without becoming preachy. It may even make you think differently on the philosophies of spiritual warfare after reading.

The book depicts an unseen tableau of demons and angels battling for our souls in our world. Sudden urges, burdens of the heart, strange coincidences, and outright miracles are explained as being the divine work of God's Heavenly Host, or the evil machinations of Satan's demonic forces. The angels derive their strength and power from the prayers of God's people. The demons gain theirs from the fear, depravity, and corruption of we simple humans.

A tale of human corruption, fascination with the occult, demonic possession, the conquering of a small town, and the good folk who are battling the evil is woven seamlessly into the spiritual tale of guardian angels, salvation, and the power of prayer.

The story is engaging, full of thrills, chills, twists and turns. The characters are believable, spiritual and flesh-and-blood alike. It plays out almost like a fantastic movie as you read. You won't want to put it down.

You don't have to be a Christian to enjoy this book. And while the outcome of the story is never in doubt, the ride through the events leading up to the thrilling climax is wild and exciting. You won't look at religion the same again.

If certain aspects of the story were updated to contemporary themes, and given a Hollywood budget, this would make a sure-fire blockbuster movie. The main problem would be the typical watering down of the religious overtones and Christian themes by Hollywood. *sigh*

I give This Present Darkness full marks; 5 of 5 Raivynns!

Raivynn Rating

Open Water (2003) DVD

2007-07-10T13:32:00.000-04:00

I am never scuba diving. Ever!

This film is like an 81 minute long public service ad showing you the perils of open water scuba diving. It shows us an unmarried couple who take a spur-of-the-moment diving vacation. They are dive certified and end up on a chartered boat in some un-named tropical locale. A mishap in the head count (why not have a sign-in sheet???) leads to our two protagonists being stranded two hours out from land, in the middle of the ocean.

That's where the based-on-a-true-story begins.

Daniel and Susan, our erstwhile divers, decide to do their own thing and not stay with the group. (There's Public Service Ad #1 - Stay With the Group!) They also spend too much time fiddling with some eels and petting a nurse shark, surfacing right at the 35 minutes dive time allotted for the trip. (PSA #2 - Be on Time!)

The boat is gone, the crew having flubbed the headcount and no one else noticing two people were missing. (PSA #3 - Make Friends Who Will Miss You! and PSA #4 - Don't Trust the Locals!)

Gradually, the two adrift divers realize they are lost at sea. Things begin to get worse as panic sets in, and the sharks begin to circle. If you follow closely, the film follows the Five Stages of Grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. It gives an interesting, even emotional, look into their situation.

The duo must deal with dehydration, motion sickness, hunger, fear, jellyfish swarms, and the ever present sharks as they try to survive. Daniel and Susan act like I imagine most couples in love would in a situation like this. It wasn't overblown. It wasn't melodramatic. They love each other, help each other, even yell at each other, but through it all they are there for one another.

The ending is more Perfect Storm than Titanic. It's melancholy, and leaves you a bit disappointed. But it's real. It feels true, like it would happen that way.

The scenes with the sharks were done using live sharks. No CG was used in the film. The whole thing was financed by two people, director Chris Kentis and his wife, producer Laura Lau. It was digitally shot, and often had only two or three crew filming (plus the actors) on weekends and holidays.

For an independent film shot for a mere $130,000, Open Water is a surprising well made movie. Lion's Gate purchased the film for $2.5 million after a screening at the Sundance Film Festival, where it was very well received. It grossed over $52 million worldwide.

I mention all that because while the film itself, while good, is not overly impressive, how it was made is. In this summer's glut of high budget, over-the-top films I've seen, Open Water is a refreshing change of a well-told, well-acted story done on a minimal budget.

For those of you with kids or easily bruised sensibilities, there is one (totally un-needed) scene of sexual nudity, and several places with heavy cursing. Though, in all honesty, I would have said much worse in that situation, and the cursing lent the film more realism than if it were eliminated or cut down.

The DVD I watched (Okay ...bought for my collection) is a Widescreen, 2-Disc set with tons of features. There are two commentary tracks: one with the director and producer, one with the actors. also included are Deleted Scenes, English and Spanish tracks (how do you scream in Spanish?), a Making Of featurette, and a short feature called "The Indie Essentials".

I haven't viewed the extras yet, so cannot really comment on them at this time.

For a bargain bin $5 movie, it was a good investment. I'm sure I'll watch this again a few times, as well as view some of the extra features.

As rental, you wouldn't be wasting your time or money. As a purchase, if you like survival flicks as much as I do, this is a decent one. I give Open Water a very solid 3 out of 5 Raivynns!

Raivynn Rating

Die Hard 12: Die Hungry

2007-07-08T22:36:00.000-04:00

This is the funniest thing I've seen this week!

It's from the Ben Stiller Show

WoW, Farts -- Raivynn Has No Post Again!

2007-07-08T15:04:00.000-04:00

The actual fart tune was ripped from Family Guy which was parodying the song "Dueling Banjos", which is an iconic song from the movie "Deliverance".

Yeah, I'm bored. I have no real stuff to blog about today. The WoW Anvilmar server was buggy, so I came to drop this on you.

Sorry, Bruiser. I know I promised no more farts on Sunday, but ... WoW deserved it!

And that one dwarf sure had a purty mouth. ~.^

Common Scents

2007-07-07T13:41:00.000-04:00

A woman in Detroit is suing the city over co-workers' use of strong perfumes and air deoderizers. (Read it here!)

This story comes at a great time because I was going to revisit a previous post from a week ago when I wrote a mild rant about strong scents in public places. In that rant, I mentioned a poll you could take in my blog's sidebar.

The poll question read, "Should Strong Perfumes, Colognes, and Hand Lotions be Banned From Use in Restaurants and Work Places?" There were 9 votes total; 6 for banning (66%), 2 for not banning (22%), and 1 undecided (11%). And, yes I know there is a percent missing, gimme a break this isn't advanced math I'm doing here. ~.^

Now, I should have reworded that from Ban to Restrict. I don't think actually banning the use of personal scents is a reasonable response. But the scent wearer (user) should also exercise some common sense on how much to wear.

An anonymous comment on that post claimed the scent users have a right to personal expression.

To an extent, I agree with that statement. people should have a right to express themselves. Of course, obvious limitations to society and laws need to be observed. I may like walking around my house naked, but my kids don't need to see that, nor my neighbors across the street who happen to glance through my unshuttered, open picture window. I'm also pretty sure my cats don't particularly care for it either. Sure, they put on a good show of ignoring it, but I hear them sniggering to each other about it later.

My opinion is that your right to personal expression stops at my personal space. If I can smell you from three or four feet away, strongly and clearly, then you are invading my personal space, and you should move (or maybe wash it off). Perfume and other scents should be a personal thing. A person should have to be right up near you, within your personal space, to smell it.

Unless you are stating that your personal space extends around yourself in a substantially larger radius than others?

I consider it rude for someone to use a scented lotion, or to spritz perfume, while in a public place. Especially an eating establishment, or a grocery store.

Would they like it if I walked by their table and ... farted?

Hey, it's a natural bodily function. God created the ability for the human body to release excess gas. Perfume is a man-made substance, not natural. But, if I stood there and played the Flight of the Bumblebee with my Tushie Tuba, I'd be tossed out of the restaraunt; maybe even arrested.

Why? Because it is rude, offensive, and fairly gross ... by society's standards (and my own). Is not the stench of floral assault not as rude, offensive, and gross? I don't want to smell it at my table, let alone taste it! Yuck! But, perhaps farting is my way of expressing myself?

No? I don't think that excuse flies for either circumstance.

The above reminds me of a true story. It takes place long before smoking was banned in restaurants. I was maybe 16, so this had to be in the mid to late '80's.

My mother, my sister's mother-in-law, and myself were at one of our favorite pizza joints. Seating was in booths down a very long room, about 15 booths to a side; six seaters, eight if you were thin or very friendly. A wall ran along one side of the booths, with a six foot high barrier wall along the other. It was topped with various plants and a bronze runner bar.

We were seated, about half-way though our meal, when a group of five men entered and asked (almost demanded) that we move because this was their traditional booth. Of course we said no, there were about twenty or so other booths available for them to sit at and we had already begun eating. They cursed at us and sat directly behind us. Three on the bench directly behind my mother and myself, two across the table from those three.

Immediately they all lit up cigarettes and cigars. Annoying, but not much we could do other than move. Even though my mother has breathing problems compounded by smoke, she was adamant about not moving.

Then the "gentlemen" began holding their lit cigarettes (and one cigar) over their shioulders. Smoke began to billow into our eating space. We politely asked them if they would stop holding their cigarettes like that. They laughed and started to turn their heads and blow the smoke at us. One guy even tapped his ashes onto my mothers neck.

We complained to the restaraunt owner, who we knew as my sister had once dated his son in high school. Dimitri, the owner, apologized, and gave us our meal free, but said he couldn't tell them to stop because he didn't want trouble with those men. I got the picture. Yeah, Dimitri's place was THAT sorta pizza joint. >_>

We got the rest of the food packed up in boxes and my mother and my sister's in-law left, walking down the small hallway to the exit, the six foot barrier wall high wall to their right. As they passed where the men were you could hear them laugh harder and call us all sorts of cruel and nasty names. I was at the front counter, talking to Dimitri.

About this time I saw their waitress bring over their orders.

I said goodbye to Dimitri, casually grabbed the lid off a very full floor ashtray next to the counter, walked down the hallway, and as I got next to the Darwinian rejects' booth, I upended the entire ashtray over the wall and onto them, their food, and the huge pitcher of beer they were drinking.

Then I ran like hell.

The next time we ate at Dimitri's place, he said absolutely nothing to me about it, but I did get a free piece of baklava, "just because". ~.^

So, the next time someone sits near me in a restaurant and whips out the lotion or perfume, I think I'm ordering up a mess of baked beans.

Ah, I smell victory!

Transformers (2007)

2007-07-05T09:34:00.000-04:00

This summer's blockbuster event is Transformers. And, unless you've lived under a rock for the last 20 years, you pretty much know what the movie is about.

Big. Transforming. Robots.

Transformers is a pure action romp from start to finish. You have Huge Shape-Shifting Robots fighting the military, you have Huge Shape-Shifting Robots fighting a secret government agency. You have Huge Shape-Shifting Robots fighting each other.

Oh, and a Little Shape-Shifting Robot fighting all that, plus Shia LeBouf and his hot girlfriend.

I enjoyed this movie. You don't get too many "popcorn flicks" like this every year. It was fast, it was energetic, it had a decent story, it even had made you care, just a little, about the people and robots in it.

In truth, the movie was more about people with some Huge Shape-Shifting Robots thrown in, than about Huge Shape-Shifting Robots who meet people.

And, that's okay.

One of the things the old Transformers cartoons did not depict very well, or at all, was how the Transformers being on Earth affected anything. The movie shows us, sometimes in excruciating detail, just how the United States would respond the Huge Shape-Shifting Robots ... pretty much how the Government is depicted responding to anything from outer space ... shoot at it, capture one, and torture / experiment on it!

Still, it felt plausible, and for once our government and military isn't portrayed as some inept, bumbling, and vaguely evil entity. (Though the throw-away, snide political commentary about the President is more biting). I suppose being a Fourth of July release, it behooved the filmmakers to show the US in a good light. Pump up the patriotism, fuel the war machine, and all that. *shrug*

Still, while the movie, overall, was a blast to watch, it suffered from similar plot bloat as did Spider-Man 3 and Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. There are several plot threads, and so many characters introduced, that you begin to feel slightly overwhelmed.

There are six groups of characters that alternately interact with one another throughout the film, eventually converging together in the film's climax: Shia LeBouf's Sam Witwicky and his girlfriend and family; the Special Forces military team; the Secretary of Defense (Jon Voight, yay!) and his signal breaker team; the enigmatic Sector 7; the brave Autobots; and the evil Decepticons.

I think they should have lost the Sector 7 and most of the signal breakers stuff and focused more on Sam Witicky and his relationship with Bumblebee (the yellow, Camaro Autobot). To me, that storyline was the true heart of the film, and it seemed a bit rushed and somewhat forced in places. Shia Lebouf was a great fit for his character, though at times he seemed more like his Even Stevens character in his frantic yelling and screaming at the beginning.

The Army vs. Robot sequences were great. Lots of explosions, plenty of cool guns, awesome special effects. Some of it could have been cut down, but Michael Bay sure loves his exploding action sequences. I'm not a huge fan of the way he does action. I much prefer the cleaner style of action I saw in Live Free or Die Hard to his choppy, quick shift style. It's not horrible, but I just prefer to see what is going on, rather than semi-see it and have to guess.

I liked having the Secretary of Defense in charge of things. Jon Voight is one of my favorite actors, and I really enjoyed seeing him in this role. The signal trackers were okay, but too much focus and importance was given to them, and the addition of Anthony Anderson's character was totally unneeded, slowed things down, and was just jarring in its blatant attempt to be "funny". (Though still not as ear-shriekingly bad as Bernie Mac as the car salesman at the beginning of the film).

The Decepticons looked sufficiently menacing, and very fluid. The Autobots were similarly fluid, but seem to convey a more benign nature. The CGI teams did excellent work with the designs and animations.

All the Transformers were realized perfectly on screen. You fully buy into the idea that these Huge Robots could transform into the vehicles and other shapes. The one thing that seemed incongruous about them was how they were able to move almost silently while walking or hiding. You'd think there would be great big WHOMPS when they took steps due to their massive size.

Peter Cullen returns as the voice of Optimus Prime. He makes the movie. Without him the movie would still be pretty good, but having him reprise his role as Optimus makes it freaking great! Optimus is more humorous in the film than in the cartoons, a refreshing change. All the Transformer dialogue is as fluid as their animations. You feel they are definitely "more than meets the eye".

There were a few other things I didn't care for in the film ... the Allspark's size-shifting, a few rude humor scenes, a bit more strong language than I care for in a "family film" (mostly several Mother Fu ... never completely spoken, but you know we all mentally finish the statement), and the ending sorta made me think "Why didn't he just do that in the first place?"

Overall, I liked it ... a lot. I'd go see it again, except I'd have less to drink beforehand as the movie is two and a half hours long. I'll definitely be getting this on DVD. And I eagerly await the sequel.

You know there will be one. They left it open at the end, with a hook or two here and there.

Still, you really only need one reason to go see this film ...

Big. Transforming. Robots.

I was wavering between a 3 or a 4 for my rating, but the movie has grown on me in the two days since i saw it. So I am giving Transformers as solid 4 out of 5 Raivynns.

Raivynn Rating

Happy Fourth of July

2007-07-04T10:26:00.000-04:00

Wishing you and yours a safe and happy Fourth of July!

I'll be spending the day mucking about in WoW, watching one of 12 new DVDs with the family, likely playing a game or two with the kids, and once it gets dark ... Fireworks! Or, what passes as legal fireworks in my town.

Sure, I could basically lie to one of the hundreds of firework vendor tents scattered all over the county. I could tell them I wish to purchase the fireworks for agricultural purposes. I wouldn't need to worry about getting in trouble because the cops don't really enforce the ban on non-sparkler fireworks.

But, I feel it is wrong and sends a poor message to my kids. I'm constantly telling them not to lie, not even on the little stuff. How would it look for me to lie just so we can blow stuff up in celebration of our country's Independence? Real good way to honor my country ... by lying.

Of course, with all the politicians, you'd think lying would be the perfect way to celebrate. =/

Going to the Movies

2007-07-03T09:30:00.000-04:00

My mother and I are heading to the local cineplex at the mall to see Tranformers today. We'll likely be heading out around noonish, grab lunch at the mall food court, then slip into a 12:40 or 1:10 showing. Depends on how much we lallygag about in the food court ... and how crowded the mall is, I suppose.

I was not the biggest Transformers fan as a kid. I never even had any of the toys, though I did watch the cartoon. Not slavishly, but if it was on, I was home, and nothing else was capturing my attention, my eyes gazed upon the brave Autobots as they battled the evil Decepticons.

I did watch the Beast Wars era of Transformers, however. There were few totally CGI shows out back in 1996, and I found it visually entertaining. Plus, the show came on right after I got home from my graveyard shift job, and I watched it while munching a bowl of cereal before I showered and went to bed.

I don't know, in detail, the Transformer mythology. I'm avoiding reading up on it at Wikiepedia or other fan sites, so as to not taint my experience seeing the movie. I am already a little leery at the robot designs compared to what I recall from the cartoons and CGI series. But, I try to see movies about pre-existing properties (like super-heroes, and such) with an open mind. I like to think of the movie continuity as an alternate reality of sorts. This way I lessen any disappointment I might have about differences from the original source material.

I'll write up a review of the movie in the next day or so ... after I stop expecting every car, truck, or airplane to suddenly shift into a robot form with that digital ratcheting sound, that is.

Tagged for Jesus

2007-07-02T09:58:00.000-04:00

My regular blog buddies have been doing a thing where they "tag" a blog who is then supposed to list five reason why they dig Jesus, then tag 5 others to do the same.

The problem with this is those who are some of the last to be tagged, are limited in who is left to tag from their usual blog group. I don't know if I can retag someone, or even who has already been tagged. A few people I am blogging buddies with wouldn't appreciate what they would perceive as "blog spam", others have different views about religion. Again, they might not appreciate being tagged.

I'm awaiting some official ruling as to what can be done. Until then, here are my "Five Reasons I Dig Jesus":

¤ He undertook incredible punishment, pain, and persecution before He died for our salvation. Too many people focus only on His death and Resurrection, and seem to ignore or pass over His suffering before that. It's easy to die, and being the Divine, Resurrection (while a miracle) is what He is. I'm more impressed and thankful that Jesus would willingly subject himself to the beatings, the kicks, the punches, carrying the cross, the crown of thorns, the nailing, the spear thrust, the bitter water for me. I fancy I would be able to die for my loved ones, but I don't know if i could willingly withstand torture.

¤ His forgiveness. Jesus forgave those who tortured him, those who reviled and spat upon him. He forgives me. How cool is that?

¤ Jesus was a carpenter. He worked with his hands. In carpentry, you sometimes need a gentle touch, sometimes a forceful touch, always with precision, in order to build something worthwhile and sturdy. You see this in other aspects of His life in the Bible, too.

¤ Jesus was not afraid to stand up for what is right. He faced down angry mobs intent on stoning a prostitute. He stood up to, and threw out, the moneychangers in the temple. He even stood up to Satan on the mountaintop.

¤ Jesus was a great story teller. Sure, now we call them parables, but He told stories that entertained, not bored, all while getting his message across.

So, there you have my five.

Until I learn more about the rules of tagging, I'll just tag one person for now ...

Tekphreak

Who Put the PU in My Supper?

2007-06-29T09:54:00.000-04:00

I'm at a restaurant yesterday, taking my mother out for some lunch, and just as we are seated at a table, a nearby woman uncaps her lotion bottle and begins lathering the pungent cream all over her hands.

She is a mere few feet away and the sickly sweet smell quickly roils over to invade my rather sensitive nostrils. I try to ignore it. It doesn't work. The woman spreads even more noxious slime across her raspy knuckles and the fumes waft over me in waves of excruciating reek. I literally begin to gag.

Now, I am pretty sensitive to strong odors. Specifically floral and other "sweet" smells. Not everyone is, I understand this. But, more than a few are. I am seconds away from reversing the natural digestion of my earlier breakfast. My plan is to aim it Lotion Lady's way.

Instead, I grab my menu and previously delivered beverage, and move to a booth a few dozen feet away. I gasp for fresh air, as my mother explains to the waitress why we moved. Lotion Lady and her husband are looking our way ... laughing.

Other than the laughing, this is an all too common scenario for me as I go out in public places. Mostly it occurs in restaurants, but even trips to the grocery store, mall, or Wal-Mart assault my senses with women laden in lotions, poured in perfume, or clouded with cologne.

Typically, it is one of three demographics who are walking miasma clouds; teenage girls, "desperate" housewives, or old women.

I think the teenagers bathe in the perfume to cover up the un-washed smell of themselves. Teen boys also do this with colognes, but it is far, far less noticeable to me. In the hot Florida weather everyone sweats, and no girl wants to smell like dirty socks. So they pour perfume on themselves to mask the stench. This only makes them reek in a different way.

Yuppie women, the desperate housewives, also seem to delight in making themselves into walking perfume counters. My theory on this is that the yuppie penchant for having aromatic candles burning in their houses, scented bath products, and designer perfumes, their sense of smell has been so overwhelmed that, instead of a moderate amount of scent, these nasal terrorists require massive quantities to be able to smell it.

Old women are in a simimalr position. Your sense of smell fades as you age (one of the reasons food seems to get blander, and spicy food tastes better, even if your heartburn tells you not to eat it). Therefore the older women use more product to be bale to smell it. This explains why scents popular with older women seem to come in huge bottles. They need the quantities it hold so they can get enough to smell it themselves.

Several years ago, I had severe respiratory problems. I'd miss weeks of work at time fighting off lung infections, double pneumonia, and excruciating asthma attacks. Just as the doctors would clear me safe to go back to work, I'd come down with another go-round of problems.

One doctor asked where I worked. I figured he wanted to make sure it wasn't with harmful chemicals or other toxic fumes. I described my open air phone center, with it's rows upon rows of low-walled cubicles. He nodded and asked me if there were many women who worked there. Around 80% were women, I answered. He asked how many did I see using lotions, spritzing perfumes, spraying desks with sanitizers, hair spraying their coiffures.

I paused ... most of them.

And that was my problem. I was breathing in all this chemical garbage for 9 hours a day. It aggravated my weakened lungs and immune system, setting off a chain reaction of bronchial inflammation, mass mucus generation, and other nasty reactions in my chest and throat. It also pushed my allergies to the limit.

Government has banned smoking in most public places, and I applaud that. But I sure wish some restrictions on the use of perfumes, lotions, and other scented products would be imposed.

How do you feel about strong scents in public places? Does it bother you? Do you get sick from them? Do you contribute to it with your own barrage of aromatic concoctions?

Blogger has a new Polling feature I have taken advantage of. Please take a moment to answer the poll to the right, in the sidebar. It's near the top, so you may have to scroll up.

Answers are anonymous, and no personal data is gathered by clicking on it (maybe your IP, though). I dunno if any cookies get transmitted.

The poll will up for a week, after which I'll revisit the numbers in a future blog post.

Until then, you got a spare clothespin on you?

Live Free or Die Hard (2007)

2007-06-28T09:35:00.000-04:00

Oh Noes!
Terrorists stole teh Interweb!

The fourth installment of the Die Hard action franchise (Die Hard 4.0 in most non-US markets) pits Bruce Willis' everyman hero, Detective John McClane, against Internet terrorists bent on the destruction of the United States ... or are they?

The movie plays out like a watered-down Hackers (1995) meshed with Bruce Willis' own, more recent, 16 Blocks (2006), with more explosions, cursing, and improbable situations thrown into the mix.

And, since when was it decided the Die Hard franchise was to be turned into buddy movies?

Die Hard with a Vengeance paired Samuel L. Jackson with Bruce Willis. It was a departure from the previous two films; not only by adding a secondary "buddy" character, but by moving the location from New York, losing Reginald VelJohnson's Sgt. Al Powell, and not happening on, or around, Christmas. For all that, Die Hard with a Vengeance was a fun, entertaining action romp.

Live Free or Die Hard pairs Bruce Willis with Justin Long as Matt Farrell, a computer super-nerd. I was extremely worried Long would pull the movie down and was very surprised when he didn't. You actually begin to like the mousy computer nerd as he slowly transforms from the whiny, scared spitless punk in the beginning of the film into "a guy who does what is needed because there is no one else to do it."

Along the way we are also introduced to McClane's grown up daughter, who while not having a lengthy part in the film, plays an important role. Okay, she ends up playing a hostage, thus giving McClane more incentive to beat the snot out of the bad guys. It's not like he wasn't already trying to stop them from mucking up the country, now he's really pissed at them.

What is wrong with bad guys, anyhow? In every single action movie where a villain uses the protagonist's loved ones as a hostage, it always turns out bad. All it does is make the good guy madder, and sets him on a bee line straight for the main baddie.

If they absolutely have to use a beloved hostage, why take that hostage with you?

Put the hostage somewhere as far from where you are, or plan to be, as possible. then make sure the good guy knows exactly where the hostage is and how to get there. Send them to MapQuest for directions if needed. But make sure he goes after his daughter / wife / fiance /best friend / whatever far, far from you. While he's out saving the hostage across the state, blow up the world from the relative safety of your good-guy-free command center.

Better yet, don't actually have the hostage at all. Fake it. So when Good Guy finally arrives to save her, she's not there. Never was there. He can call her on a cell and find out she was okay, never in danger, just over at a slumber party enjoying make-overs, popcorn, and talking about boys or something. Good Guy is now tired, all his anger used up on killing disposable baddies, and now relieved to find out his daughter is safe. Bad Guy laughs and presses the Big Red Button ... BOOM ... plan completed.

Of course, if McClane didn't take out the main bad guy's love interest, he might have left his daughter alone. The baddie love interest is played by Maggie Q, and is a sexy computer nerd ninja. Seriously. And you get to see her and McClane go mano-a-mano. Or would that be man-a-womano? Talk about women gaining equality. ~.^

Timothy Olyphant plays Thomas Gabriel, the mastermind behind the Internet terrorists. He starts off a bit stiff, but quickly warms up to be a credible nemesis for McClane. He's brilliant, ruthless, and just a bit off his rocker. And, like all Die Hard villains, there is more under the surface of his actions than what it seems. Not terribly far under the surface in this guy's case, but still ...

What I liked is that he was the mastermind, the brains behind the whole thing, not the toughest SOB McClane has to face. He manipulates, he schmoozes, he gives the orders to do the dirty work, then watches it all unfold. Of course, as it unfolds, McClane begins to unravel it, and Gabriel becomes more and more unhinged. You can see the seething anger roiling beneath the surface of his carefully maintained calm exterior. The eruptions of anger, the losses of control, are interesting to watch.

Anyhow, McClane gets his ass kicked almost as bad as he kicks the bad guys', as usual. He always bounces back. Sometimes cleaner, and less bloody, than he was in the previous scene.

As Gabriel growls to McClane at one point, "I thought I killed you," McClane's "Yeah, I get that a lot," puts his violent day into perspective.

The action sequences are as good as ever, though Willis is showing his age in more than just his heavier features and lack of hair. He seems a little slower, a little stiffer, more world weary ... but this is counter-pointed by his experience with this sort of thing, and referenced, tongue-in-cheek, several times throughout the film. He is an anachronism in a high-tech world.

Over all, it was a good movie. Very fun, very entertaining, not too cerebral. It moved at a decent pace, though the beginning was a bit slow, and the various cut-aways to the FBI dragged down the pacing a bit. The action was what you would expect from a Die Hard film, as are the improbable situations McClane finds himself in.

I mean, he takes out a helicopter with a car. He fights a sexy computer nerd ninja girl inside an SUV inside an elevator shaft. He fights an F35 with a semi-truck. He even suddenly knows how to fly a helicopter ... sorta. The ending is a good, yet typical, McClane shocker, but you never get to hear his full catch-phrase.

The price they paid to get a PG-13 rating. Though, with all the other rampant cursing and heavy violence, you wouldn't know it.

I recommend seeing this in the theater for the Big Screen and the Movie Sound (and the Jumbo Coke Freezies). I'm also getting it on DVD when it comes out. Not the best action movie of the summer, or of the series. But it's better than Vengeance and a worthy addition to the fast fading (and fast aging Willis) Die Hard franchise.

Next up ... Die Hard with a Respirator!

Yippie Kiy Yay. Mother Fu ... *cough cough cough*

Raivynn Rating

The Cable Guy

2007-06-26T13:14:00.000-04:00

The Cable Guy Came
No, His Name Wasn't Larry
Everything Works Now

I'd been having intermittent Internet outages caused by my cable modem. After I went through TeleHell to get a live technician, he eventually set up an in-house technician to come out.

The tech came today. Nice guy, contracted out by BrightHouse to service cable equipped homes.

He did a signal test on the cable line which runs to my modem. It was at a -2. Now, I thought -2 sounded horrible, but he assured me that the cable modems are rated to work well at signal strengths of -7 to +7. He also told me the sporadic outages were likely due to the modem overheating.

I don't know anything about it. I suppose he was telling me the truth and not feeding me a line. When my modem was not on the fritz, it worked fantastically well. But, I can see the overheating thing. I am online way more than I should be. Also, it is pretty dusty down where the modem sits, though the modem itself had very little dust on it, or in it, when I blew it out with compressed air.

There was, however, a HUGE sticker with esoteric scribbling on it which the previous cable guy had placed over a significant portion of the air vents/heat sink on one side of the modem. I had removed that the other day, at the urging of a good friend, and only had the cable modem crap out on me once since.

Anyhow, I also mentioned that the digital signal to the tv set-top box occasionally was distorted, resulting in staticy pictures, skipping frames, or garbled sound.

He replaced a splitter piece with a new, better one. And he also replaced a length of cable which had a barrel connector (a splice, basically). The Brighthouse guy who installed my digital service less than year ago apparently spliced a R59 cable into an R6 cable. (I didn't know the significance of that either ... cable man enlightened me).

The R59 cable is pretty thin, extremely flexible, with less wiring inside, resulting a poorer signal and increased chance of kinked and broken lines inside the sheath. He was pretty shocked that someone would use that kind of cable to carry a digital signal and wondered that we did not have even more problems than I described.

Cable man cut an new, single length piece of R6, a much thicker, less flexible line, and installed that. He also exchanged some hardware components out in the main box outside.

Everything seemed fine when he left, no troubles since in the hour he's been gone.

Hopefully, everything stays working with no distortion or outages.

Time will tell.

Found out he plays Everquest, the original version, since 1999. So we discussed online gaming for a while as he worked. I used to play EQ, then played NWN Neverwinter Nights), followed by GW (Guild Wars), leading up to my current obsession with WoW (World of Warcraft). We agreed to disagree on which was the better MMORPG (Massively Multi-player Online Role Playing Game).

Speaking of which, my new Blood Elf Priest is feeling lonely. I think I'll get her some exercise slaying evil critters or something. ~.^

Jokes My Kids Told Me

2007-06-25T09:59:00.000-04:00

Here Are Some Riddles
Mouse Over to See Answers
My Kids Told Me These

Q - What do you get when you cross a centipede with a chicken?
A - Drumsticks for Everyone!

Q - Why couldn't the elephant get on the airplane?
A - Because his trunk wouldn't fit in the overhead compartment!

Q - How do you keep a moron in suspense?
A - I'll tell you next week!

Q - Why was 6 scared?
A - Because 789!

Q - What did one IM'r say to the other IM'r when he noticed the last donut was gone?
A - OICU812

Q - Why would you never starve on a beach?
A - Because you can always eat the sand which is there!

Q - If one child has 6 2/3 sand piles and another has 3 1/3, and you combine them, how many sand piles do you have?
A - One! (If you combine them, there is just one)

Q - What is the greatest worldwide use of cowhide?
A - To cover cows!

Q - What one word has the most letters in it?
A - alphabet

Q - What is the longest word in the English language?
A - smiles (there is a mile between each s!)

My Desk

2007-06-24T10:14:00.000-04:00

My Computer Desk
A Fire Hazard in Waiting
No Open Flames, Please

So, a few of the blogs I visit regularly have been showing off their desks recently. I was stuck for a short post today, and decided I would, as well. Try not to look away at the horror. It will just sear itself into your mind anyhow ...
It's one of those corner-style units, and fits perfectly in the bay window of my room.

As you can see, I'm a slob. The bookcases and night stand in the room synergize fluently with the clutter and disorganization of the desk. (Actually, I know exactly where everything is. It's when I clean up that I lose things.) Think of it as Funky Feng Shui for Freaks.

Items of note:

Clear space on top for cat to laze in the morning sun, tail hanging down atop my monitor.
Cardboard stand-up of Varesh from Guild Wars: Nightfall
Tennis ball (used for boredom relief and tension release)
Stuffed toys (Pikachu and Snorlax from Pokemon; Sully from Monster's Inc; Gamera, a cheap turtle made in China claw game prize that goes on all my trips with me)
An old mirrored compact (strategically set to show me whatever is going on at my bedroom door ... blasted kids!)
My box o'meds (if I keep it anywhere else I forget to take them)
A 20-year-old ceramic statue of Oliver from Disney's Oliver & Co.
Paring knife used to open DVDs (lousy security tape)
Cruzer micro 1.0GB thumb drive (on the monitor base)
Several Dungeons & Dragons reference manuals from 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 3.5 editions

Missing, and my most prized possession, is a hand blown glass dragon. It is no longer up there because said cat from item one knocked it down and broke it! Said cat is lucky she is cute and fluffy, or said cat would be in the doghouse. I've had Yazinperindacles (what I named the glass dragon) since I was in my late teens. (Actually, Tek was with me when I got it at the Bay Area Renaissance Festival).

Strangest thing is probably a box of Fiddle Faddle (two weeks old, half eaten, stale, and should be thrown out) laying down in one of the large cubbys.

So there you have it. My home within my home. The place I spend the vast majority of my life.

How Much is Too Much?

2007-06-23T13:28:00.000-04:00

The Wall o'Movies
Towering Over the Room
I Hope It Won't Fall

I own 371 DVD movies and 17 boxed sets of TV shows.

As you can see, it takes up a whole wall of my house. Well, okay, not the whole wall. Not even both bookcases. Media cases, actually. Got 'em at Best Buy for about $75.00 a year or so ago. They hold up to 756 CDs, or 360 DVDs per unit.

Still, that's a lot of DVDs in there. A few CDs with Christmas or Kid's songs on it, some blank VHS tapes for .. a VHS I no longerhave ... Hmmm ... and a plethora of stuffed animals.

The drawer unit in the middle has ... I don't really know, but I'm sure something is in those drawers.

I love to collect DVDs. And, I've even watched most of them. Not all, but most.

Like, my mother has the Thornbird mini-series. Blech. I just recently got her Roots on DVD. She has watched it 5 times. Me? None.

My newest aquisitions were Ghost Rider (saw), Bridge to Teribithia (in Mom's room, haven't seen outside of theater), and a 10-disc, 11-hour Pokemon collection (austenibly for the kids >_>).

I seem to collect, on average, 3-5 new DVDs each month. Sometimes more.

The collection ranges from Saw 1-3 to Fraggle Rock. From Star Wars to Stargate SG-1 (seasons 1-9). From Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to several Gamera movies. From Bruce Almighty to Ben Hur. From Spirited Away to Finding Nemo.

I've got comedies, animation, horror, drama, sci-fi, classics, anime, action/adventure, and everything in between.

Disney and Pixar animations make up one long shelf (3 compartments). Super-hero movies make up a little more than one compartment. As do the horror flicks (on the No-Kids shelf). A couple compartments are comprised of movie series ... Harry Potter, Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Spy Kids, Tremors, Jurassic Park, Riddick, Matrix, Doctor Doolittle, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and more.

The TV series include Lost (seasons 1 & 2), Stargate SG-1 (1-9), Little House on the Prairie (1-3), The Greatest American Hero (pilot and season 1), and a few others. I'm going to be adding Heroes and possibly the rest of TGAH fairly soon.

We have a system for the kids to "borrow" the movies ... Each has a laminated 4x6 index card with their name on it. When they take an authorized movie (which most are, excepting one compartment), they remove the DVD from it's slot and insert the name card in its place. This way they know where to put it when they are through with it. We also have a notepad for them to write the date and movie down. (Mainly because they'll conveniently forget they have watched their allotted amount for the day ... 3 on weekends & non-school days, none on school days, 1 on summer camp days).

I pretty much know where I took any I watch from, so I don't have a card. Nor does my mom. She cannot really make out the titles with her poor vision, so i generally retrieve what she wants to see by her vague descriptions of the movie ... "Do we have the one with the gay lawyer who gets AIDS? (Philadelphia)" or "Do we have the one where the guy takes his space helmet off and dies? (Mission to Mars)" My favorite she asks about once every few months is, "Do we have the one with the girl who turns old and ends up in a walking house with a little boy and a talking fireplace? (Howl's Moving Castle) No matter how many times she see it (and it is one of her favorite movies), she just cannot recall the name of it.

I pretty much know what movies we have, and which ones we don't. Though I do sometimes get confused when we are out and decide to get some of the Wal-Mart bargain bin DVDs. We used to have around 300 VHS tapes before we went strictly DVD. (We donated all those to the local Salvation Army.) There's been more than one occasion where I've thought we had it once on VHS, but not on DVD and been wrong. Or, vice versa. I just return the duplicates and get something else. hehe

One day I'll catalog this huge collection. Or seek therapy for it. =/

Charlie the Unicorn and the Candy Mountain

2007-06-22T14:49:00.000-04:00

Pastel Unicorns
Hopping and Prancing Around
Please, Please Make It Stop

My buddy TekPhreak had the following video posted on his website/blog a few days ago. I was simply going to provide a link to the page he had it on but I cannot find it now. *shrug*

Ever since I saw this video, I cannot get the damned thing out of my head.

It seems I see or hear the name Charlie dozens of time per day now, and my mind instantly starts doing the high pitched, whiny "Chhhhaaarrrrlllieeee" in place of the actual name. I also see pastel colored unicorns hopping about.

Okay, I always see pastel colored unicorns hopping about, but that was from a bad trip on prescription cough syrup, muscle relaxers, a fever of 103°F, and some My Little Ponies. We won't go there just now. >_>

So, since my brain is now infected with Charlie the Unicorn, I am now compelled to infect the rest of the world with it, too. Sort of like the rage infection in 28 Days Later, but with annoying voices, prancing pastel unicorns, exploding singing letters, and a mountain of candy.

Yeah, so ...

I hope you watched it.

And, Tek?

Damn you. Damn you to Hell!

~.^

Oops, I Forgot ...

2007-06-21T23:01:00.000-04:00

11 o'clock
Errands, sick Mom, and played WoW
I forgot my blog

Ever got so busy with Life that you simply forgot to do something you usually do every day?

For those of you who checked in all day, you saw mine was the Roost. Clean forgot about it today.

Not, too, late now is it? Eleven at night?

Oh, well ... I should have a movie review tomorrow, or the next day of Evan Almighty or 1408, depending on what I see tomorrow ... and if I see one.

Die Hard - Music Video

2007-06-20T14:15:00.000-04:00

Live Free or Die Hard
McClane is back in action
Yippie Ki Yay, Mo ...

**WARNING**
This music video contains adult language.
It may not be suitable for kids or work!

Saw this today at Ain't It Cool News and thought it was great.

The lyrics, adult language and all, seemed to capture the spirit of the Die Hard franchise. One I am slightly disappointed was neutered to a PG-13 for the 4th outing.

Live Free of Die Hard opens on June 27th. I plan on seeing it, with a review to follow, of course. Until then, enjoy the video by Guyz Nite.

Movie Trailer: Punch-Out!!

2007-06-20T09:55:00.000-04:00

Little Mac is back!
The Sandman is going down!
Uppercut now, Mac!

This was Team Awesome's entry in the Nintendo Short Cuts Showcase Contest.

It's not as polished as the winners, or runner-ups, showcased on the Nintendo site, but I loved it all the same.

Punch-out!! (and it's successor, Super Punch-Out!!) was one of my favorite NES titles.

I didn't own the game myself, but a neighbor boy did. When I went over to play with he and his sister, invariably we'd get into a Punch-Out!! match. I was pretty good, but Sandman was always tough for me to beat.

This faux movie trailer brought back all those fun memories of virtually bludgeoning Don Flamenco, King Hippo, and the other racially stereotypical digital boxers into oblivion.

Ah, those were the good old days.

TeleHell

2007-06-19T11:51:00.000-04:00

Internet was down.
A simple call to fix it,
I foolishly thought!

Today began much like any other this summer.

Woke up around 7:30, got myself dressed and ready as the kids finished eating their breakfasts, doing their morning chores, and getting ready for camp. Leave about 8ish. Had to stop for gas. It's only $2.85 a gallon, but still takes $46.00 to fill up the truck. *sigh*

Get to camp around 8:30, drop them off, and drive back home. Play with my cat, Tut, for a bit, then turn on the ol' computer for some blogging, email, games, and whatever.

Except my Internet connection ... was GONE!

I check my Device Manager. All is as it should be.

I make sure the lights on my router and modem are flashing what they should be flashing. Verdant lights twinkle happily at me from the modem. Amber sparkles merrily from the router.

They were lying.

I reset both the router and modem. Nothing.

I power down the computer, shut off the monitor, and kill the power from the surge protector. Everything goes dark. The only sounds are the rattling whumps of my ceiling fan and the distant rumbling hum of someone mowing their yard a few houses down.

I drum my fingers impatiently, silently counting to 100 in my head.

With a flourish I tap my CPU to life, click the monitor back on, and watch as the modem and router flicker through a cheery power-up cycle.

My desktop soon glows softly in the still dim room. My mouse eases the cursor over to Thunderbird and ... nothing. Cannot connect to pop server.

Nooooooooooooo!

Knowing the outcome, I resolutely open Internet Explorer, hoping more than a white screen of nothingness would appear. It didn't.

I call Brighthouse Networks local support number.

A cheerful woman's voice comes on and begins telling me to speak this, or say that, say nuevo for Espanol. Do I want Sales? Do I want Billing? Do I want to order new products? Am I having technical issues?

Gone are the days of button mashing. Technology is now such that I merely need to speak my requests to this disembodied, vaguely digital woman's voice and all my worries and cares will slide from my burdened shoulders like butter on a hot griddle.

I speak clearly. I take care to enunciate each word, each syllable, each glottal and vowel.

"Technical Support."

The digital woman must be hard of hearing.

"I'm sorry. I did not understand your response."

I repeat myself.

"You said you wanted Belt Buckle Sports. Is this correct?"

I answer clearly, "No!" to which she asks me to repeat my previous request. I speak slightly slower, slightly louder, with enough forced enunciation to make my high school English teacher weep tears of unfettered joy.

"Tehkk-Nih-KhahL Suh-PorrrT!"

"I'm sorry. I did not understand your response."

I blow a frustrated blast of air through my pursed lips, as I debate the ethical ramifications of cursing out an automated answering service voice.

"One moment, and I will transfer you to Sales."

What? No! When did I ever get close to saying Sales?

I sigh to myself and figure at least I'll get a live person who can then (hopefully) direct my call to the proper place.

The hold music is a bit creepy. Something you might hear as mood music on a Sci-Fi Original movie about haunted houses, or zombie filled graveyards. I wasn't encouraged.

The strange music is interrupted by another vaguely digital voice, this one male, informing me that I now can bundle my cable, Internet, and telephone services into once package and save money. Please ask the customer service rep about this spectacular bargain when they come on the line. Which, by the way, may be a while as they are all busy helping other customers and would I please wait while they take my call in the order in which is was received.

The cheesy Scooby-Doo mystery music comes back on. I swear it's louder than it was before.

Three more times over the next ten minutes I get the sales pitch to bundle my services with the busy sales rep spiel following after.

Just as I decide to open up solitaire and amuse myself, the music stops. I hear a click ... another click ... any moment now a real, live person would help usher me to the correct line. I begin to smile, happy this long, annoying wait is near an end.

Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn Ehn

They ... Hung ... UP!

I calmly depressed the Off button on my cordless, set it down, and took a slow sip of water.

1 ... 2 ... 3 ... 4 ... 5 ... *grumble grumble* ... 6 ... 7 ... *mutter mutter* ... 8 ... 9 ... "Son of a @#$%$!" ... 10.

I took a deep breath and once again dialed the Brighthouse number.

The electronic answering girl must have gotten a dose of digital Q-Tips, because this time she understood everything I said on the first try.

I was again eeking towards happiness as she cheerily informed me she was transferring me to the Technical Support department. Yay!

A click ... I held my breath ... a second click ... I began to worry at my lower lip ... silence.

At least there was no disconnected signal. I hung on the line, daring to believe I was being connected.

Suddenly the same voice was back in my ears telling me a simple reset of my modem should solve the problem I was having. (I'd already done this manually once). She would be happy to do so remotely for me, if I wished.

I said, "Yes." I would like that. Anything. Just get my Internet working!

She asked for my account number (Ha! Like I knew that) or my home telephone number, area code first, please.

I spoke my number out, in the same manner, tone, and clarity I had used to get this far.

"I'm sorry. I did not understand your response."

@#$%^&*!

"I'm sorry. I did not understand your response."

I resolutely TYPED the number in.

Wonders of wonders, she informed me she was accessing my account. Why the blue blazes didn't she just tell me to say or type the lousy thing in in the first place? Grrrrr!

"Your modem has been reset. Usually the effect is immediate, but may take up to several minutes to see a change. Thank for calling Brighthouse Networks. Goodbye."

What? No wait, you flat-toned, digital demon. I want someone LIVE!

I hung up and silently fumed to myself for a minute. I'd at least see if this had worked or not.

It didn't.

I waited longer.

No go.

I called back, my fingers strangely calm, my emotions eerily silent. I think I had the placid look of a serial killer just then. The kind where the interviewed neighbors always claim the killer was "quiet and kept themselves, never saw 'em hurt a fly".

As soon as Betsy Babbles came on the line with her recorded banter, I mashed the 0. Repeatedly. With great force. I think my phone may have said ouch. I'm not really sure, as all I heard was my blood rushing.

The male automaton came on and again informed me all reps were busy, would I please wait until my call was blah blah blah. Yeah, yeah. Just hurry it up, will ya?

My wait was a mere 15 minutes.

During this time I learned about service bundling, modem resetting, cable set-top resetting, how to pay my bill online, how to pay my bill through my cable TV, how to use On-Demand programming, that Brighthouse Networks was yet again rated #1 in customer service and satisfaction (I missed more that was said during the pealing laughter which burst out of me at that last).

Finally, a very sweet voiced, polite, and awfully youthful woman came on the line and asked for my info. I provided it. Calmly. It wasn't this poor wage slave's fault the automated phone system was the bastard child of Machiavelli, Satan, and half a dozen political bureaucrats.

I told her my problem. I suggested my modem may be malfunctioning.

She tried to be helpful. She really did. But she was utterly clueless.

At one point, she told me that if I could open my email program, then I had to be connected to the Internet. =/

Eventually she placed me on hold to "check her resources".

I worked years as over-the-phone technical support for a large communications company. I knew "check my resources" was a euphemism for asking your boss for help.

A few minutes later she was back on the line, relief evident in her voice, that she couldn't do anything from her station and I needed to be transferred to the local office because obviously my modem wasn't working.

Um, yeah. That's why I spent the last 45 minutes trying to navigate the labyrinthine phone system and said the same thing at the outset of the communication with her.

I kept my voice calm, even cheerful, thanked her and said, "Yes, I'd love to transferred to someone who could help me."

Another few clicks, a short stretch of silence, and I was once again mired in the hold music form hell, punctuated by droning advertisements of services, products, and I think even one may have discussed the mating ritual of the African honey bees. I'm not really sure because my eyes had glazed over, my butt had fallen asleep, and my elbow seemed permanently locked in a phone holding position.

Then, joy of joys, a young man got on the line.

He seemed to know what he was doing. He was confident in his speech, yet a titter of nervousness could be heard behind the bold front. I think he was one of those people who are pretty smart, know a lot of things, but just don't quite grasp the intricacies of personal communication.

He walked me through a few tests, laughed nervously at my attempts of humor, fiddled with something on his end, then had me recycle the whole system. Power it all off, unplug the router, unplug the modem, disconnect the modem from the cable line.

Then we waited.

I tried small talk about my cat, who was loudly meowing at me because I was strangely sitting on the floor, under the desk, where he took afternoon naps and he wanted know if he could join me. Mr. Technician laughed that nervous twitter of his, likely wondering if my problems weren't caused by a surfeit of feline fur clogging some vent somewhere.

Judging by the amount of dusty fur and dander particulates floating around under there, he may have been right.

A few minutes passed in uncomfortable silence after that until he asked me to reconnect everything and power it all back on.

I did, and it all worked.

Still, he said, my signal was weak and he would set up a in-house technician to come over and test my cable lines, the modem, and my patience. The last was a joke he said. Ha ha ha!

So, after an hour plus on the phone, on the floor, and in a bad mood, I was back online. Yay! I could now read my bloglist, post to my own, play WoW, surf the Internet for funny and interesting videos, whatever I wanted. The Cyber-world was mine for the taking again.

So I ate lunch.

re: Your Brains

2007-06-18T12:17:00.000-04:00

Grab a gun! Run! Hide!
Zombies are on the rampage.
Brains on the menu!

I love this music video created by Jonathan Coulton using World of Warcraft as his visual media. The parody nature of the song, as well as his vocals, remind me of Weird Al. You can find more of Jonathan's work at www.spiffworld.com.

The video combines three things I love: Funny Songs, WoW and Zombies.

They aren't called zombies in WoW, though. Undead is their general term; Forsaken and Scourge are the two factions of Undead. Players basically play Forsaken with Scourge being the "enemy".

Forsaken are real nasty pieces of work. They are tenuously allied with the brutal Horde. An alliance of convenience only. While they dupe their Horde allies into fighting the Lich King and the Scourge, they secretly (okay, sorta secretly) are developing a plague which will destroy humanity.

They don't eat brains, per se. But Undead do get a skill called Cannibalize. Players can induce this skill to "eat" a slain humanoid or other undead foe, thus restoring a portion of their own life force (health).

The game models of Undead are great, too. Bones and withered muscle tissue showing through pasty, necrotic flesh. Wild hair styles. Quick, yet jerky movements.

Surprisingly, I only have one Undead toon: Dropdeadhot, female mage. (On the Anvilmar server if you want to drop by and say hello! ~.^)

Hmmm, now I'm in the mood to watch one of my zombie movies ... Dawn of the Dead, perhaps?

Happy Father's Day

2007-06-17T10:05:00.000-04:00

Father's Day is here.
A time to celebrate Dad
With another tie.

Happy Father's Day to all my paternal readers!

I hope you have a great day with your families, eat lots of good food, and don't strangle yourself by accident trying on the new tie you likely got! ~.^

What is the deal with giving a tie anyhow?

It seems the gifts most given to dear ol' Dad on Father's Day are either a tie, a wallet, or a bottle of Brut or Old Spice cologne.

Are we telling Pop that we wish a noose around his neck? That he's only good for making and dispensing money? That he smells?

This year, break tradition! Take Dad out to eat. Give him a gift certificate from his favorite store. Wash his car for him. Mow the lawn for him. Maybe just leave him the heck alone to snooze in his easy chair for the day.

But don't give him a tie.

Unless it's one of those gag ties that light up, play "I'm Too Sexy", or has #1 DAD emblazoned across the front.

Those are perfectly fine.

Especially with the matching coffee mug!

Happy Father's Day!

Summer of Sequels

2007-06-16T10:13:00.000-04:00

Movies. Some good, some bad.
Little new under the sun.
Yet we eat them up.

2007 may go down as the Summer of Sequels.

Spider-Man 3
Shrek the Third
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer
Live Free of Die Hard
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Rush Hour 3
Bourne Ultimatum
Oceans 13
TMNT

There are other sequels this year. Not all for summer, not all blockbuster, tent-pole releases. Mostly horror sequels such as 28 Weeks Later, Saw IV, Hannibal Rising, Hostel: Part II, Halloween (okay a remake more than sequel), Resident Evil: Extinction ... maybe more I missed. We also have Daddy Day Camp (which, after seeing the trailer for this, I'm tempted to place under horror), Alien vs. Predator 2, National Treasure: Book of Secrets, Evan Almighty, and I'm sure a few others I don't know of.

One I didn't list, that I'm actually very excited to see, is a re-release of Tim Burtons The Night Before Christmas in Digital 3-D!

Now, I saw Meet the Robinson's in Disney Digital 3-D earlier this year. It was phenomenal! Gone are the days of cheap red and blue plastic lenses. No more rough cardboard frames gouging furrows in your nose. Leave behind the myopic disorientation of the old 3D ways. Now we have digital projection onto a silvered screen (yes, the silver screen is back!) with polarized lenses set within study, comfortable plastic frames.

The 3-D effects are astounding, and in their true colors and clarity. You can see normally out of the glasses without headaches, disorientation, or dizziness. Plus, when you look at another person sporting the cool lenses, you get this sci-fi glimmer in the lenses and their eyes from the special coating.

Anyhow, Nightmare Before Christmas in 3-D will be freaking cool.

There are new movies this year which have come out, or are coming out, that are not retreads or sequels. Many of them comic book properties, or based on popular books.

300
Transformers
1408
Simpsons
Stardust
Underdog
Beowulf
The Mist
and the Golden Compass

Of all those mentioned, I am most eagerly awaiting The Golden Compass. I've read the first two books, and while I'm not particularly impressed with the theology espoused by Philip Pullman, his story is engaging and adventurous. The trailers for the film are stunning, and it is lining up to be a huge trilogy in the vein of Lord of the Rings or Pirates of the Caribbean.

I'm also interested in The Mist.

It is based on one my all-time favorite Stephen King short stories, a novella, actually. An end-of-times, monsters-on-the-loose romp of action and terror. I'm worried, as with most of King's book-to-film conversions, it'll lose it's charm for me on the Big Screen. I'll have to wait until November to find out, though.

More contemporaneous, is another King conversion, 1408. The short story was intriguing look into a haunted hotel room, with typical King weirdness and even more of his much-loved creepiness. The trailer for the film version, starring Samuel Jackson and John Cusak, seem to capture the spirit and feel of the story. I'm looking forward to seeing it.

One sure-fire blockbuster movie this year I am surprising not interested in seeing is Ratatouille. I love Pixar films, and have seen each and every one they've released in a theater, as well as own them on DVD. Something about this one, however, doesn't draw my attention. In part because I despise Andy Dick. I don't know why, really, but he annoys the crap out of me. Also in part because, while the animation seems as good as anything, nothing i saw makes me want to see it anymore than other animated movies this year.

Though, for animated movies, TMNT was the best I've seen recently. Darn good story, fun and exciting adventure, and just plain coolness on the Big Screen. Of all the super-hero flicks I've seen this year, TMNT wins hands down.

Maybe I'll post a list of films I planned to see this year, along with whether I've seen them, and school-style grade for them. Hmmmm ....

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)

2007-06-15T14:19:00.000-04:00

I enjoyed the movie. Even though most of the critics and comic geek purists said I shouldn't, I did.

I went in without any expectations except to enjoy myself, drink my freezie coke, and ogle super-hero antics on the big screen.

The movie is much better than the first, in my opinion.

First, it was a mere 85 minutes long. There was plot, story, and action ... no tedious fluff that tends to pad out and bloat more recent movies. I felt almost as if I were watching a comic book come to life. (Well, okay, comic books from a few years ago, not these melodramas the comic industry seems keen on churning out lately. I'm all for backstory and seeing the inner workings of super-hero, but 20 of 24 pages of standing or sitting around chewing the fat gets old, fast.)

With the origin of how the Fantastic Four came to be already told, the story could focus more on ... well, the story.

It was lifted from classic Fantastic Four comic mythology.

A being of cosmic enormity which devours worlds to sustain itself is on its way to Earth, sending its Herald (Silver Surfer) to prepare for its arrival. This being is Galactus.

Now, comic purists are howling that Galactus is not realized on screen as he is in the comics. And, to be brutally honest, I'm glad. I mean, would you really want to see a bright pinky-purple and blue clad cosmic giant with a goofy horned helmet and no pants show up to eat your world?

Of course not! He wouldn't even have to destroy life on Earth before he ate it. We'd already have laughed ourselves to death at first sight of him.

Instead, we get this destructive, cosmic nebula-type thing, with vague shadows of the classic horned helmet and other anthropomorphic details here and there. If you aren't looking for them, you may not even notice them.

Could Galactus have been designed better for the movie? Possibly. But I feel this was a decent choice given the absurdity of the original (yet classic) look of the Devourer of Worlds. (Early appearances of Galactus even had a huge G emblazoned across his chest, while latter showings added blue pants to his outfit).

I suppose the film writers could have opted for the Ultimate version of The Devourer of Worlds, Gah Lak Tus. An immense, 100,000 mile long hive mind conglomeration of city-sized robots. It may have worked on screen, but I do prefer the more simplistic (possibly shrouding?) space cloud used in the current film. The novelization of the film does refer to Galactus as Gah Lak Tus, however, so ... who knows?

Maybe the shrouded mystery is what it should be. A being so immense, so powerful, so far beyond mortal comprehension that we can only see a swirling vortex of cosmic nebula.

Victor von Doom is also back again. The cosmic power which gives the Silver surfer his abilities as Galactus' Herald, revive and restore Dr. Doom. He plays a typically villainous role in the film, one suited to the comic book style. He wants to steal the Surfer's power. I am not a big fan of Julian McMahon as Doom, though he is less stiff and annoying than in the first film. He does pull off the smarmy, egotistical persona fairly well, however.

The titular heroes of the film, the Fantastic Four, are played with more familiarity then in the first one.

Thing is more at ease with his grotesque appearance. Even in love with his blind lady friend, Alicia Masters. Michael Chiklis seems to be the comedic side-kick of the series. Much more so than in the first, or in the comics. It is not overly distracting, but it is slightly overdone. I missed him bellowing his signature battle cry in the film, though he does quip it once. He makes a darn good Ben Grimm, though I always envisioned the Thing to be taller.

The Human Torch is as arrogant and greedy as ever, yet still with the strong core of love for friends and family. Chris Evans plays him perfectly, I think. He has the looks, the build, and the attitude to carry off the disaffected sarcasm and hot-headedness of Johnny Storm.

The Invisible Woman has the best powers of the bunch, in my opinion. Force fields, invisibility, and telekinesis (basically). Jessica Alba is a credible Sue Storm, though she too has gotten bashed for her portrayal of Invisible Woman.

Mister Fantastic is as pliable as ever, and he seems to be loosening up in this go-round. He even steals a page from ol' Spidey and gives us a dance number, Fantastic style. Ioan Gruffudd comes into his own as Reed Richards in this movie. I did not care for him in the first one, but he really made the part his own now.

All the characters' powers were showcased, more believably than before, and with more versatility. I particularly enjoy seeing the powers used in everyday circumstances. I mean, c'mon, who in their right mind wouldn't use their super-powers to make life easier for themselves?

Lastly, we have the Silver Surfer.

An iconic character from Marvel, who got his start in the pages of the Fantastic Four.

He was portrayed nicely in the movie, much as I imagined he would be were he a real entity. You'd think a big silver man flying around on a surfboard would be ludicrous, but you somehow buy into the fantasy without question.

The great Doug Jones plays the non CG-body of the Surfer, with a melodramatic Laurence Fishburne providing the voice. Jones was fantastic, Fishburne was adequate. I'm not sure who's voice would have fit the character better, but the stilted enunciation of Fishburne, coupled with the attempted other-worldly deepness of voice just didn't quite fit for me.

On second thought, I think I would have rather seen Doug Jones provide the voice, as he did for his portrayal of Abe Sapien in Hellboy. But then the producers may have feared for too much comparison between Jones' Ape Sapien and the Silver Surfer.

It's bad enough everyone is saying the Surfer looks too much like the T-1000 terminator from Terminator 2.

I say the T-1000 looks like the Silver Surfer.

Speaking of which, the look was dead on to what I expected he would appear as. The CGI was a bit stiff, a bit other-worldly, but that may have been what the SFX guys were going for. Still, I feel the Silver Surfer was the best part of the movie, and the rumors of a Silver Surfer movie make me very happy.

I'm definitely getting this on DVD when it comes out. And I would love to see a third film, perhaps one featuring Prince Namor, the Sub-Mariner! (Who has his own movie in the pipe-line, but I'd like to see him in a FF film first).

If you didn't like the first movie, you may not like this one. It is an improvement, and as I said, more like a live-action comic book than a typical super-hero flick. Try it and you may find yourself pleasantly surprised.

If you liked the first one, you will really like this one. Less fluff, more stuff. Brighter, faster, and more fun than the original. A very good successor to it's progenitor.

It's not the best movie you'll see this year, by far. But, by far, it's not the worst.

I recommend seeing it at the theater for the big screen experience and the great surround sound effects. Especially if you can suck down a freezie coke while you watch! ~.^

Fantastic Flop?

2007-06-15T10:09:00.000-04:00

Super-hero movies
I can't get enough of them
Hope this one is good

In about an hour, I'm heading out to go get some Twinz hotdogs (or maybe some Chick-fil-A .. hmmm) and go see Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

The movie has been panned by critics, though much less than they did for the first outing of this super-hero franchise.

I liked the first one. Maybe it's just me, but I go to enjoy a movie, not to tear it apart bit by bit, looking for flaws. Even if it is a beloved comic book super family (of which I still have many comics). I'll make notice of what is different from the source material, but I won't decry the film maker, actors, or production studio for deviating from it. Instead, I'll try to enjoy it for what it is ... a retelling.

Now, sure, the first film had it's flaws. I think the whole Doctor Doom bit was poorly acted, and his costume was just ... jarring. But, overall, I enjoyed it as a fun, super-hero movie.

I'm there to shut my brain down for a little while and have fun. FF4 delivered for me in that respect. I have it on DVD, and have watched it several times. (OK, I seem to only really watch and rewatch my superhero movies .. and my zombie movies).

So, I go to FF4:RotSS not with high hopes, or grand expectations, but with a desire to relax, have some cinematic fun, and enjoy the special effects and seeing one of my favorite super-hero teams on the big screen. Plus, the Silver Surfer.

He was always one of my favorites.

I'll likely post a sort of review later today or tomorrow of the movie.

Until then, be good and watch the skies!

I See London, I See France ...

2007-06-14T11:36:00.000-04:00

A small, Southern town
Some indecent exposure
Overreaction

A Louisiana town has officially banned saggy britches.

You know, those drawer drooping dimwits that parade around flashing their unmentionables for all to see. I never got the supposed fashion statement they are trying to make. "Look at me, I'm an idiot"?

It was bad enough when it was just the waistband of their underwear being broadcast in Technicolor. Now, like the pic shown here, kids (and some "adults") are wearing their pants below the 49th parallel.

It can't be comfortable.

I want to rush over and yank the pants down the rest of the way whenever I see it.

Now, I don't find it particularly "indecent". The underwear baring butts are still basically covered. It's more stupid looking than obscene.

And I'm not entirely sure an ordinance against it, with penalties of up to six months in jail and a $500 fine, is any less stupid. It may even be more obscene.

And, the verbiage of this new law covers more than flashing your skivvies. (Hehehe I made a pun!)

The ordinance states, "It shall be unlawful for any person in any public place or in view of the public to be found in a state of nudity, or partial nudity, or in dress not becoming to his or her sex, or in any indecent exposure of his or her person or undergarments, or be guilty of any indecent or lewd behavior."

So ... women with those see-through blouses should fall under this law. (Another stupid fashion statement, btw.) What about middie tops? Are belly buttons next on the list of do-not-show?

Plumbers need to beware.

And what of those women with the hip-hugger jeans and those lower back tattoos (ha! lower back, upper ass is more accurate) that look more like a patch of unruly and highly displaced hair than art when more than twenty feet away?

What about breastfeeding?

Sure, I don't really want to see some woman whip one out and suckle her young while I'm trying to enjoy my milkshake at the mall food court. But, if discretion is used, and some modicum of modesty, it never truly bothers me. Inevitably, some bare flesh does show while breast feeding. Will that woman go to jail for nurturing her child?

It is a very broad-based ordinance. One with which I am not at all comfortable. It leaves much too much open to interpretation. And that paves the way for unequal enforcement.

Is this something that should be legislated? If so, aren't the penalties imposed above much too steep?

What are your thoughts?

Me, I'd just take a belt to 'em! ~.^

Back in the Saddle Again

2007-06-13T09:11:00.000-04:00

For a time, no posts
My log-in was not working
Now it is fixed. Yay!

You may have noticed there has been no activity on the Roost since June 2nd, 10 days. Well, there have been comments. One was from me about not being able to log in.

But who reads those things?

Besides me? Some funny haiku replies, though. Keep 'em coming!

Blogger took it's sweet time in getting back to me about the problem. But, in the end, it was corrected. Something about when I changed my password, my email address was screwed up somehow.

Ah, well. It worked out okay, anyhow.

I was really, really sick for about a week. Severe sinus infection slash head cold. Fever, chills, aches, pains, dehydration, diarrhea, chapped lips, sore nose, and enough mucus production to put all the children of every Kleenex worker through college. Twice!

So there you have it. The deep, dark mystery of my long absence.

The Roost will get back to normal in the next day or two.

I'm off to shovel the drifts of tissues decorating the house as if a deranged Old Man Winter summoned a snot storm ...

Barry

2007-06-02T10:10:00.000-04:00

A mighty wind blows
Water cascades from the sky
No pictures today

Tropical Storm Barry is currently about 50 miles or so Southwest of Tampa. Where I live.

Now, ol' Barry isn't a particularly powerful storm. His winds are just barely Tropical Storm strength, but his rain is pretty heavy. Lots of lightning, too.

I live in a mobile home, and winds aside, the main problem we're having is periodic power fluctuations. Tiny brown outs.

It makes doing anything on the computer an issue. =/

This means taking an hour or so to write up and organize the rest of the Busch Gardens pics. I already lost some work from the power cuts. Very annoying. So I'll finish it later today, assuming the storm passes by this late afternoon as predicted, and when the power stops playing peek-a-boo.

Enjoy your, hopefully less windy and wet, day!

5, 7, 5

2007-06-01T09:07:00.000-04:00

Busch Gardens pictures
They are postponed yet again
My apologies

If you didn't recognize it, the above was a Haiku. A style of Japanese poetry utilizing a pattern of five syllables, then seven, followed by another five. Though true Haiku has even more rules to its creation, mine just follow the 5,7,5 rule.

Ahhhh ... now the post title suddenly makes sense. ~.^

All this month, I will begin each post with a relevant Haiku.

Don't ask me why I am doing this. I have no real reason, no underlying cause. I simply thought it might be fun.

Some of the Haiku might be funny, some serious. I am sure more than a few will be out right strange. But, it sounds to be a fun project for the month.

I am also discontinuing the Penny Doubled Daily footers at the end of each post. (Unless I get people who actually like seeing it down there). It is extra work each day, and the numbers are becoming too huge to handle daily. The main page for it will continue to be updated, though I am moving from a daily update to a weekly one. Again, the work now involved in deriving the numbers is challenging and a pain to do every day.

I'll have the last of the Busch Gardens pics up either later today (hahaha) or, more likely, tomorrow.

The reason for my not posting them today is I seem to have contracted a sore throat and chest muck. I'm not feeling very well, at the moment, and don't want to deal with actual thinking beyond this post.

It sorta of sucks, too, because today I had planned to begin my exercise regimen at the YMCA after I dropped the kids off for camp. Since my nose is stuffy, and my breathing is labored, I decided starting would be counter-productive. I am going to rest (and do laundry) today instead.

I'll be keeping a blog-log of my progress once I begin. I'm not sure how I'll be doing it, but ... I'll figure something out.

Oh, for those of you may have been wondering (all one of you) ... my visit to Tek went great. We chatted, and laughed, like old times. We reminisced, we talked of the future, of things current. We watched "Stranger Than Fiction" while eating pasta Mrs. Tek cooked. Mmmmm- mmmm.

I alternately was barked at, growled at, nipped at, played with, and slept on by one of the other of their two dogs, Amber and Joey. My cats' noses almost twitched off when I came home as they smelled me from top to bottom.

A good day, with good friends. Can't ask for more than that.

Bathroom Humor

2007-05-30T23:57:00.000-04:00

I'm off visiting Tek today. So you'll have to wait another day for the final batch of Busch Gardens pics.

To tide you over, we have a return engagement from Kinder Happy Hippo and Dog. ((You may recall them from this earlier filler ... ))

And that, kids, is why you should never play shark and try to scare your bathmate!

Busch Gardens - The Animals, Part 2

2007-05-30T09:35:00.000-04:00

All Aboard!

The picture train is about to leave the station.

Please keep your arms and legs inside the blog at all times. Do not try to stand up while the blog is moving. Secure loose articles, as this blog cannot be held responsible for lost or damaged property. Flash photography is permitted, but it might enrage the animals who will then maul you, and those seated near you. This blog will not be held liable for that, either. Do not fold, spindle, staple, or mutilate ... anything. Ever.

And, for heaven's sake, don't ever, EVER, remove those tags from your mattress. The Mattress Police will come and blow up your house, cook your pets, send your children to the salt mines, smear you with honey and stake you out over an ant hill in the blazing desert sun until you can state all the US Vice-Presidents in reverse alphabetical order while gargling spoiled milk and fish entrails.

This blog might be held liable for that, so please, for the sake of my family, DON'T DO IT! (Well, except the kids and salt mine thing, you can cause that if you want.)

Now that I've gotten you warmed up for the trip ... we're off!

I forgot to show you the very first pictures I took when we arrived at Busch Gardens. How inconsiderate of me.

Right past the entrance, with it's 738 shops, 327 kiosks, and about 63 eateries, (not to mention the hordes of annoying camera wielding staff who body block your forward progress and demand you hold still for a family picture you can pick up at the end of your visit for only $39.95, the deed to your house, your first born child, an arm, a leg, and whatever loose change you have in the little space between the front seats of your car), is the Morocco section.

A great animal habitat called Myombe Reserve is there. It's basically a primate preserve with chimps, gorillas, and other monkeys that you can get as close as a pane of thick glass to.

We didn't go in there.

I did take a a shot of the kids monkeying around, though.

Right before that entrance is a large habitat for American alligators.

Now, I live in Florida, so seeing these great reptiles is nothing new to me. They are not so prevalent, nor as easily located, as when I was a kid. Or as the popular myth of Florida being overrun with gators makes it seem. But you can find them in almost every pond, lake, or stream, man-made or not.

Floridians know to respect the alligator. Because if you don't, it might eat you. Or, at least your dog.

Anyhow, for those of you who live in more northern climes, here is a closeup of Alligator mississippiensis, the American Alligator. (And, yes, that is the true species name of it).

This bad boy was about 9 or 10 feet long. And, don't let his sun-basking, half-asleep look of calm serenity fool you. This beast is watching you, waiting for you to fall over the railing into his habitat, and wondering if you taste like chicken.

You can tell this by his toothy smile.

Back on track now.

After the Bird Gardens, Land of the Dragons, Stanelyville (SheiKra, Stanelyville Falls Flume), and a long trek, we found ourselves entering Timbuktu.

Timbuktu is the central area of Busch Gardens. It is done up in African-style wood and stucco buildings, brightly colored awnings, and the traditional African roller coasters, flat rides, and carnival games. No self-respecting African village is ever without those, you know.

The coasters are small ones, and the flat rides range from sedate bi-planes, to an inverted pirate ship, to a whirling Sandstorm. We didn't ride any of those this trip, though Sandstorm and Cheetah Chase are on my to-do list for the next trip. As well as the Pirates 4-D show which is in the old Dolphin show palace.

I used to love the dolphin show, but Busch had to close it down due to high costs, low attendance, and the fact that people kept tossing coins into the dolphin habitats and they got copper poisoning from all the pennies. Okay, the penny thing may be a local urban legend, but there have been documented cases of dolphins in captivity dying from copper and zinc poisoning from coins in their water, as well as chlorine poisoning. Sad, sad, sad. :(

So, while sad about the dolphins, we were still hungry. So we threaded our way through the carnival like atmosphere of Timbuktu and made our way to my new favorite restaurant ... The Desert Grill!

This used to be the Oktoberhaus. A German themed eatery with the best Black Forest cake you will ever eat, live polka bands, and literal dancing in the aisles.

Now, it is more in keeping with the whole African theme ... on the outside, at least. Inside is good, ol' American-style food, live floor shows, and chamber music when the floor shows aren't going on.

Seating is casual at long trestle tables with small benches. You go through a line and pick out the foods you want, almost buffet style, though servers are there to serve the hot foods. Then you pay for it, and tote it back to your table on a tray.

The food ... mmmm-mmmm ... the food. I had Grilled Chicken with Fettuccine Alfredo. It ran me about eight bucks, but it was a heaping plate full. And, the chicken wasn't some scraggly, thin piece of poultry. It was a thick, full breast of chicken grilled to juicy perfection. I also got a pickle. Not some dark green anemic from-a-jar pickle. Oh, no. This was a huge, almost 6 inch long (pre-sliced), near two inch thick delight of green dilliness. *slurp slurp*

But the best part, oddly enough, was the breadsticks. Best. Breadsticks. Ever.

I could have made a meal just out of those breadsticks. They were baked to perfection; golden brown, lightly buttered, a hint of garlic, paprika, and other spices. Soft, warm, and slightly chewy, I literally have had dreams about those breadsticks since then. Talking about them has made me hungry.

Yes. They were THAT good. Breadsticks.

Tyler got the same thing I did, though he said the chicken was bland. This is because if chicken has no breading or honey mustard on it, he doesn't believe it's real chicken. Tim got spaghetti, and he ate the whole portion of it. Quite a feat for him. Mom got a meatball sandwich, and she claimed it was the best meatball sandwich she has eaten in a long, long while.

There are other foods there; salads that looked so tasty you could feel the the lettuce crunching in your mouth by looking at it, other sandwiches piled with meat so high you need a skewer to hold them together as a mere toothpick would not suffice, and desserts so decadent you teeth began to rot just by ogling them.

If it were not for the lousy $9 parking fee, and the fact my mom cannot walk that far thus requiring a mobile scooter, I'd eat there quite often.

Enough about food. No snack carts on this picture train, and I don't want you falling off raving in hunger.

I showed you ride shots of Rhino Rally, but I didn't show you any animals from that adventurous, epic journey.

Unfortunately, you won't see many either. =/

The truck ride was so bouncy, so jouncy, that taking a clear shot was about as easy as picking your nose with a spoon. You can dig and dig, and you might strike gold, but it'll be a mess and probably painful.

Okay, that was gross, and there was no pain involved taking photos on Rhino Rally (except my poor knee that kept hitting the door hinge on every jolt). But, they were fairly blurry, and only a few came out mostly unscathed.

The first was an African elephant. Several shots were taken of him, but only one came out well.

This will be an ongoing theme with my animal shots from here forward. I think the animals were trying to tell me something. =/

There also was a Black Rhino habitat we drove through, but we only saw one, just as we were leaving the enclosure. The bugger was lazing in the shade of a small bluff, languidly watching us as we jostled by. I got lucky in that I only took one shot of him (and it came out well), and that he wasn't mooning me. Though it -was- a rearward profile.

You may have to look close to see him. Even though he is a Black Rhino, he is very dusty from rolling on the ground to cool off, and he almost blends in with the orangey-brown rocks behind him.

Shortly after, we drove through a crocodile enclosure. Right through the water! Of course, there was a very visible fence angling out towards where they presumably were. I didn't see any. I was on the opposite side of the truck from where they were supposed to be, but even far out in their lake, I saw nothing.

There was a freakin' huge one in a glass enclosure near Rhino Rally that I snapped a pic of after we left the area however. He's hard to see well, as the glass and water distorted his profile, but you can still see how huge he was.

There were two more animals I got clear shots of while on Rhino Rally.

One is some striped deer-like animal I cannot recall the name of. Impala? Antelope? I'm leaning towards antelope. It might some sort of small buffalo. I really cannot recall.

Either way, it's another butt shot. A blurry butt shot. It gives you an idea of what the other, blurrier pics must look like. =/

I swear the animals all had an early morning meeting before the park opened and decided that day was Ass Day, or something. *sigh*

The final animal I got a good shot of while on Rhino Rally was the elusive brown-maned, female Boogerdigger.

Aaaahhh, now my previous nose picking comment makes much more sense, doesn't it. ~.^

Now, to be honest, she may not have been actually digging in her nose. She may merely have been scratching it. Inside. with her finger nail. Repeatedly.

In her defense, it was hot and dusty in the area, and I had swiped my own knuckles across my nose in an attempt to quell the rising itchiness crawling around my nostrils. She just took it a step further and dug down to the root of the problem. >_>

And with that lovely image rattling around in your minds, I'll leave off this post. Tomorrow (or maybe Friday), I'll finish up with the pics of animals from my sojourn on the Serengeti Railway. There are thrills, spills, and even a few moments of unabashed "Aaaaaaaawww" to be had.

Until tomorrow.

And remember to take any belongings with you. This blog is not responsible for anything you leave behind. Because if you do, I'll sell it to pay for parking and go eat at the Desert Grill! Yum!

Today's Penny Doubled Daily Cumulative Amount for 150 days is:

$14,272,
476,927,059,598,810,582,859,694,494,863,402,897,244.15

Busch Gardens - The Animals, Part 1

2007-05-29T09:30:00.000-04:00

The wait is over!

Finally you get to see pictures of animals from Busch Gardens.

Like the Serengeti Railway, this'll be a long ride, with a few stops along the way. And, not everything you see will be animals.

Hop aboard, find your seat, break out the Big Gulp cup, and settle in. Here we go!

The first place we ventured through, other than Gwazi, were the Bird Gardens. The Bird Gardens is a lush oasis of greenery, water, and, of course, birds.

We didn't visit everything. In fact, we didn't visit much, and there is a lot to see there. There are several animals habitats, an aviary walk-thru, several stages (where no shows were playing *sniff*), and the requisite gift shops and eateries.

One of the first habitats you come across are some brightly colored parrots lounging about on a gnarled, old tree. We watched them preen and squawk for several minutes. Magnificent birds. You could see intelligence in their eyes, and I swear they were as amused by the brightly hued biped mammals watching them as we were of them.

A short distance away is the flamingo habitat. Flamingos are a very recognizable icon of Florida. Hundreds of the elegant birds flocked around, and in, a small lagoon called Flamingo Island.

These birds are not naturally pink. Their plumage gains this color from their diet of small crustaceans, usually brine shrimp. Well fed ones are bright pink, while an unhealthy flamingo might be pale pink to white, which is their natural color. These wading birds also stand on one leg for reasons unknown, though it is speculated it conserves body heat. I say they don't like getting their feet wet and dirty. ~.^

Most of them had both feet firmly on the ground the day I visited. The ones who didn't seemed to be in the water, or sleeping.

Across from Flamingo Island are two butterfly topiaries that I thought looked pretty. So I took a picture of them. The image doesn't do them justice. They were much more brightly colored in person. There were other flower topiaries, but people kept rudely interposing themselves between me and my intended shot. Most of them so they could take their own photos. I'm lucky I got this one, as some obvious foreign tourists blithely walked in front of me just as I took this shot. Fortunately, I could crop them out.

The Hospitality House is located in the bird Gardens, too. You can buy a fresh brewed Anheuser-Busch beer here, and get some fresh baked pizza. Expensive pizza, and not very big.

When I was little, you used to be able to get free samples of the beer. Assuming you were of legal age, of course. My first taste of beer was here. My Grandfather made me drink some of his. I thought it was horrible stuff. Yuck!

We used to get some beverages (beer for adults, soda for kids), grab a snack from the snack bar, and relax on the huge wooden patio overlooking Koi ponds and the Flamingos. No longer, though. The wooden patio is gone, the koi ponds are now remote controlled boat paddocks, and the flamingos .. well you can still sort of see them. *sigh*

It is still a very beautiful and relaxing location, with plenty of shade and seating. I just pine for the days of yore, I suppose. I also miss the old Brewery Tour you could take before they closed that down. Except the stairs. I don't miss climbing those long, long stairs to get to it.

While wandering through the Bird Gardens, we came across a small water habitat filled with turtles. A keeper was cleaning their habitat, and using a broom to sweep green and black sludge fro the bottom of their mostly emptied pond. The turtles were all bunched up, except for one brave terrapin who was trying to make good an escape.

I think he saw too many Spider-Man movies.

Close by, just before entering the Land of Dragons, is the Living Dragons habitat. All sorts of large reptiles were in this habitat. Even a very big Komodo Dragon. He was very close to the glass of his enclosure, and you really get a sense of the sheer massiveness of the beasts. His head was about the size of a small dog. He could probably eat a small dog in a few bites.

I even got him to say "Cheese!"

The kids even got to ride a Komodo!

Okay, so it was a statue of a Komodo, but it was about the size of the one in the habitat. Those suckers are huge! Err, Komodos, not the kids. ^.^;;

I don't want to bore you to death with more pictures today, so we'll pull into the station here. The train leaves again tomorrow around this same time. See you then!

Today's Penny Doubled Daily Cumulative Amount for 149 days is:

$7,136,
238,463,529,799,405,291,429,847,247,431,701,448,622.07